Draußen wird es langsam dunkel und die Straßen sind alle dicht bedeckt mit einer weißen Schneedecke. Es ist das erste Weihnachtsfest mit meiner Freundin Kathy. Wir hatten uns Anfang des Jahres kennengelernt und uns sofort ineinander verliebt. Ich heiße Christian, werde aber meist nur Chris genannt. Trotz diverser kleiner Streitereien die wir in letzter Zeit hatten, war heute ein wunderbarer Tag mit Kathy zusammen und er sollte noch besser werden.
Wir sind seit etwa einer Stunde aus der Kirche zurück, wir hatten uns dort das Krippenspiel angesehen, und sind jetzt dabei das Abendessen vorzubereiten. Den Kartoffelsalat hat Kathy schon fertig, ich mache nur noch die Würste warm und dann kann es losgehen. Kathy bereitet in der Zwischenzeit den Tisch vor. Ich bringe das Essen ins Wohnzimmer als Kathy gerade ein Paket unter den Weihnachtsbaum legt.
“Ich leg deins auch gleich drunter. Ich muss nur schnell das Essen abstellen.”
Gesagt getan, hole ich mein Geschenk für Kathy aus dem Versteck. Sie hat sich schon seit langem ein Babydoll Nachthemd gewünscht. Verpackt in Hello-Kitty Geschenkpapier, lege ich ihr Geschenk unter unseren Weihnachtsbaum. Das Päckchen sieht ziemlich klein aus neben ihrem, was sie mir wohl gekauft hat.
Ich lege noch eine Weihnachts-CD in die Stereo-Anlage ein und dann können wir auch schon essen. Wir früher bei meiner Mutter gibt es selbstgemachten Kartoffelsalat und Wiener. Das klingt zwar jetzt nicht sehr festlich, schmeckt aber wunderbar, ist schnell gemacht und die Küche ist danach kein Schlachtfeld wie bei manch anderem Gericht. Wir unterhalten uns über die kommenden Tage, in denen wir endlich mal ausspannen können von der Arbeit.
Nachdem alles Verspeist und wir beide satt sind, geht es auch schon ans Aufräumen. Alles schnell wieder in die Küche und in die Spülmaschine geräumt und dann kann die Bescherung losgehen.
“Ladys First. Mach du deins zuerst auf, deines ist kleiner.”
“OK, dann wollen wir doch mal schauen”
Kathy versucht erst das Geschenkpapier ganz zu lassen, aber als es überhaupt nicht ab will, reißt sie es dann doch einfach auseinander. Sie hält das rosa Babydoll Nachthemd hoch und sagt:
“Oh das ist ja super, genau so eins hab ich mir gewünscht! Jetzt bist du aber dran.”
Ok, dann schauen wir doch mal. Das Geschenkt ist ungewöhnlich weich, was das wohl sein mag. Ich versuche zwar auch das blaue Geschenkpapier mit den Weihnachtsmännern und Schneemännern drauf ganz zu lassen, aber nach 10 Sekunden reiße ich es auch einfach auf.
Im inneren erwartet mich wieder Folie. Doch diese ist fest um 8 weiße, mit Weihnachtsmännern, Schneeflocken und anderen Weihnachtsmotiven bedruckte, Windeln in meiner Größe gehüllt. Ich bekomme plötzlich ganz große Augen.
“Ich hab nicht vergessen, was du mir in unserem Sommerurlaub erzählt hast. Ich denke L müsste genau die richtige Größe sein. Ich kenn mich da noch nicht so gut aus.”
Im Sommer waren wir zusammen an der Ostsee. Nach einer alkoholreichen Nacht hatte ich ihr erzählt, das ich in meiner Jugend gern Windeln getragen habe, und das gern mal wieder machen würde. Meine Faszination für Windeln war nie weg, doch seit ich mit Kathy zusammen war, hatte ich immer weniger daran gedacht.
Wir umarmten und Küssten uns ganz lange. Als ich Kathy fragte, wo sie denn Windeln mit Weihnachtsmotiven gefunden habe, sagte sie:
“Die hab ich hier aus der Stadt. Ich hatte nach einem passenden Geschenk für dich gesucht, als ich so einen kleinen Laden in einer Seitengasse gefunden habe. Ich bin einfach mal reingegangen und der Besitzer hatte sofort das richtige für dich. Ich war zwar etwas skeptisch als er mit den Windeln kam, aber dann dachte ich mir, warum nicht. Das sind keine gewöhnlichen Windeln, hat der Besitzer gesagt, sondern Weihnachtswindeln, die Wünsche erfüllen! Ich weiß das klingt komisch, aber versuchen kann man es ja mal.”
“Mh, na da bin ich ja mal gespannt. Ich hab lange keine Windeln mehr umgehabt. Und ein bisschen peinlich ist mir das auch. Es ist ja schon ziemlich spät. Wollen wir es so machen, ich probiere eine Windel und du dein neues Nachthemd und dann schauen wir noch ein wenig Fernsehen.”
“Ok so machen wir das.”
Kathy ging Richtung Schlafzimmer. Ich ging ihr nach um meinen Schlafanzug zu hohlen. Wieder zurück im Wohnzimmer, mache ich das Paket Windeln auf. Auf der Folie war keine Marke und kein Hersteller zu erkennen. Es stand nur Unisex und Größe Flexib-L drauf. Beim Öffnen des Pakets stieg mir sofort der Geruch von Windeln in die Nase. Mmh, riecht das gut. Ich hole eine der Windeln raus und lege sie erstmal bei Seite. Ich ziehe meine Sachen aus und dann wollen wir doch mal sehen.
Ich drehe und ziehe die Windel so, das sich die Auslaufbündchen Aufrichten und lege die Windel vor unseren Fernseher auf den Boden. Da ist am meisten Platz um sich zu wickeln in unserem kleinen Wohnzimmer. Ich lege mich auf die Windel und ziehe das Vorderteil durch meine Beine durch und auf meinen Bauch. Nur ein großer Klebestreifen pro Seite, wie ungewöhnlich. Sie lassen sich aber trotzdem gut verschließen und die Windel sitzt fest. Ich stelle mich hin und die Windel verrutscht keinen Millimeter. Ich hätte nicht gedacht, dass die so gut hält. Ich ziehe gerade das Oberteil meines Schlafanzuges an, als Kathy aus dem Schlafzimmer zurückkommt.
“Das sieht ja total süß aus! Lass doch die Hose gleich aus, dann kann ich sehen, wenn du nass bist und gewickelt werden musst.”
“Die ist auch total bequem. Ich wünschte es wäre normal für mich Windeln zu tragen.”
Plötzlich merke ich, wie es warm in der Windel wird.
“Wieso ‘wäre’? Es ist normal. Ohne Windeln wären doch ständig deine Sachen nass und das Bett und das Sofa erst recht.”
“Mh, wie meinst du das denn jetzt?”
Irgendwas ist anders an meiner Windel, ich weiß nur noch nicht so genau was.
“Gut dass du die Schlafanzughose gleich ausgelassen hast. Du hast deine Windel ja ganz schön geflutet dieses Mal. Die ganzen Weihnachtsmotive sind weg.”
“Wie konnte das denn passieren, ich hab gar nichts gemerkt.”
“Das wäre ja auch mal was Neues. Soll ich dich gleich wieder in eine von den Weihnachtswindeln wickeln oder willst du lieber eine von deinen Molicare?”
Molicare? Die hab ich früher immer benutzt. Was geht hier nur vor und warum ist meine Windel nass ohne dass ich es bemerkt habe?
“Na was ist jetzt? Welche willst du?”
“Ich nehme nochmal eine von den Weihnachtswindeln. Die jetzt konnte ich ja nicht wirklich lange genießen.”
“So wie ich dich kenne wird die zweite auch nicht viel länger halten. Leg dich schon mal hin, ich hol in der Zwischenzeit eine neue aus dem Paket.”
Ich will mich gerade wieder vor den Fernseher legen, als mir plötzlich eine Wickelunterlage an dieser Stelle auffällt. Neben der Wickelunterlage liegt eine zusammengerollte und leicht aufgequollene Molicare Super Plus.
“Wo kommt das denn her?” Sage ich leise vor mich hin.
“Du liegst ja immer noch nicht da. Soll ich dich jetzt wickeln oder nicht?”
“Weißt du wo das herkommt?”
“Ist alles in Ordnung mit dir? Wo soll das schon herkommen. Die Wickelunterlage hast du doch vorhin aus dem Schlafzimmer geholt und die nasse Windel hast du dir gerade abgemacht um die Weihnachtswindel zu testen. Damit hättest du lieber warten sollen, denn da hätte das von gerade eben bestimmt noch mit reingepasst. Aber du musstest sie ja sofort ausprobieren.”
Ich lege mich also auf die Wickelunterlage und ziehe das Oberteil von meinem Schlafanzug etwas hoch, so dass man gut an meine Windel kommt. Da hat sich Kathy schon zwischen meine Beine gehockt und macht die Klebestreifen auf. Ich hebe meinen Hintern etwas an und sie zieht gekonnt die alte Windel weg und schiebt die neue unter mich. Schnell klappt sie das Vorderteil der neuen Windel auf meinen Bauch und rollt dann die alte Windel zusammen. Jeder Handgriff sitzt. Sie legt die volle Windel bei Seite. Es ist wirklich nicht mehr viel zu sehen von den Weihnachtsmotiven. Jetzt zieht sie die Seiten meiner Windel gerade und verschließt die Klebestreifen.
“So, alles wieder frisch. Setz du dich ruhig schon aufs Sofa ich räume hier alles weg.”
Ich stehe auf, die Windel sitzt perfekt, und ziehe jetzt doch meine Schlafanzughose an. Irgendwie ist es mir unangenehm ganz ohne rumzulaufen, und so ist es auch nicht so kalt. Ich setze mich auf das Sofa und schallte den Fernseher an. Kathy nimmt die zwei Windeln und schafft sie in die Küche. Danach holt sie die Wickelunterlage und trägt diese wieder zurück in unser Schlafzimmer. Irgendetwas Merkwürdiges geht hier vor. Kathy setzt sich zu mir und wir schauen gemeinsam die Nachrichten.
“Kathy, danke nochmal für das Wickeln. Ich wusste ja gar nicht dass du das so gut kannst?”
“Das hab ich doch gern gemacht. Naja ich hab dich nun schon so oft gewickelt, da kann man ja gar nichts mehr falsch machen.”
“Ich wünschte ich könnte mich dafür irgendwie revanchieren.”
“Wie wär’s, wenn du mich jetzt noch ein bisschen verwöhnst und heute Abend wickelst DU mich mal zur Abwechslung.”
“Das können wir gerne machen.”
“Und ich will anstatt meiner Tenas heute Nacht mal eine von deinen Weihnachtswindeln probieren.”
“Gerne doch. Das sieht bestimmt super aus mit deinem neuen Nachthemd. Äh Moment, welche Tenas?”
“Na die, die ich sonst jede Nacht um hab. Im Gegensatz zu dir brauch ich die Windeln ja nur nachts.”
“Seit wann brauchst du denn nachts Windeln?”
“Du bist irgendwie komisch heute. Hast du Fieber? Ich trage schon immer nachts Windeln, das weißt du doch.”
“Äh, ja. Das ist mir wohl gerade entfallen. Nein mir geht’s gut. Komm her mein Schatz, du wolltest doch ein bisschen verwöhnt werden.”
Ich ziehe Kathy zu mir ran, umarme sie und wir fangen an uns zu küssen. Dabei streiche ich ihr sanft durch das Haar. Meine Hand gleitet ihren Rücken herunter und fährt langsam unter ihr Nachthemd. Ich ziehe sie noch enger an mich heran. Meine Hand wandert weiter zu ihrer Lustzone und ihre Hand beginnt meinen Schritt zu massieren. Durch die feucht warme, etwas aufgequollene, Windel ist das ein fantastisches Gefühl. Ich tute es ihr gleich und verwöhne sie, bis wir fast gleichzeitig kommen. Wir küssen uns weiter und liegen uns in den Armen.
Nach etwa 5 Minuten steht Kathy auf um ins Bad zu gehen und ich suche uns in der Zwischenzeit einen guten Film raus. Wir legen uns gemeinsam auf das Sofa unter die Decke und schauen meinen Lieblingsfilm aus den 80er “Stirb Langsam”.
Nach dem der Film zu Ende ist, stehen wir auf um uns Bettfertig zu machen. Dabei merke ich, wie meine Windel plötzlich viel tiefer hängt und richtig aufgequollen ist. Ich ziehe den Bund meiner Schlafanzughose etwas nach vorne. Ich muss während des Films wohl ein paar Mal unbemerkt reingemacht haben, so voll wie die Windel jetzt ist. Wie ich so verdutzt dastehe und meine Windel betrachte, gibt mir Kathy einen kleinen Klaps auf den Po und sagt:
“Komm mein großer, es wird Zeit für eine neue Windel. Und du hast mir doch was versprochen.”
Wir gehen also ins Schlafzimmer. Hier sieht alles ganz normal aus, bis auf die Wickelunterlage, die schon auf unserem Bett bereit liegt. Auf einen zweiten Blick fallen mir noch zwei neue Sachen auf. Ein Paket Tena Slips steht im Nachtisch von Kathy und ein Paket Molicare in meinem. Natürlich, die Windeln! Die Weihnachtswindeln! Sie erfüllen wirklich Wünsche! Das muss ich gleich nochmal testen.
Hinter mir kommt Kathy ins Schlafzimmer. Sie hat das Paket mit den Weihnachtswindeln dabei und stellt es neben das Bett.
“Komm, du zu erst. Bevor du noch ausläufst.”
Ich lege mich also wieder auf die Wickelunterlage und ziehe meine Schlafanzughose ganz runter und mein Oberteil so hoch, dass man gut an meine Windel kommt. Wie schon vorhin macht Kathy die Klebestreifen auf und klappt das Vorderteil der Windel runter. Sie hatte sich bereits Feuchttücher bereit gelegt und fängt jetzt damit an mich sauber zu machen. Nach etwa 5 Minuten intensiven säubern, zieht sie die alte Windel weg und legt mir eine neue unter. Sie zieht die Windel straff und verschließt die zwei Klebestreifen.
“So fertig, jetzt bin ich aber dran.”
“Geht ja schon los.”
Ich stehe auf, verbeuge mich und schwenke mit der Hand zur Wickelunterlage.
“Bitte sehr meine junge Dame. Sie sind an der Reihe.”
Kathy macht einen Knicks, was total süß in ihrem Babydoll-Nachthemd aussieht und legt sich auf die Unterlage. Ich nehme eine von den Weihnachtswindeln aus dem Paket. Kathy hat sich in der Zwischenzeit untenherum schon frei gemacht und liegt mit breiten Beinen vor mir. Ich lege ihr die Windel unter, als sie plötzlich traurig schaut und sagt:
“Hast du nicht was vergessen?”
“Ach ja, wir müssen dich ja noch ein bisschen sauber machen und eincremen.”
Ich nehme also eines der Feuchttücher und gehe ans Werk. Nachdem alles sauber ist nehme ich die Creme und trage diese sanft auf ihre Haut auf. Kathy lacht dabei immer mal kurz, wenn ich eine ihrer kitzligen Stellen berühre.
“Ich wünschte wir könnten tauschen.”
Oh nein, was hab ich den da gesagt! Ich kneife meine Augen zu. Das hab ich doch nur gedacht und wollte das doch gar nicht sagen! Plötzlich muss ich lachen, weil mich irgendetwas unten kitzelt, an einer total ungewohnten Stelle. Als ich die Augen wieder aufmache, sehe ich mein Gesicht vor mir. Es drückt mir gerade einen Kuss auf.
Ich bin Kathy! Die Windeln erfüllen wirklich, mhhhhh …… Eine wohlige Wärme erfüllt meinen Schritt. Ich, also Chris, streicht mit seiner Hand über meine Oberschenkel. Er zieht das Vorderteil der Windel hoch und verschließt die Klebestreifen. Zum Glück hab ich jetzt eine von den Weihnachtswindeln um und kann mich so jederzeit zurückwünschen. Chris geht ins Bad um sich die Zähne zu putzen und ich stehe auf. Ich bin so leicht. Ich stelle mich vor den Spiegel unseres Kleiderschranks. Ich sehe total süß aus, das Babydoll-Nachthemd und die Weihnachtswindel ergänzen sich perfekt.
Als Chris aus dem Bad zurückkommt, lächelt er, wie er mich so dastehen sieht. Er nimmt mich in den Arm und wir küssen uns. Nach etwa 5 Minuten können wir uns lösen und ich gehe ins Bad. Ich nehme die rosa Zahnbürste und nach 3 Minuten bin ich auch schon fertig. Immer noch fasziniert von meinem neuen Körper, streiche ich mir durchs Haar und erforsche meine Brüste. Es wird warm und feucht in meinem Schritt. Ich brauche jetzt meinen Mann. Oh Gott, was denke ich denn da.
Zurück im Bett küssen wir uns weiter. Das Küssen wird intensiver und wir streicheln uns. Nach 5 Minuten halte ich es nicht länger aus, ich greife Chris in die Windel und hohle sein steifes Glied heraus. Vorbei ein meiner Windel, führe ich es mir ein. Was für ein Wahnsinns Gefühl. Rein, raus, rein, raus. Ohhhhh. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! … So einen intensiven Orgasmus hatte ich ja noch nie. Ich sacke erschöpft zusammen. Chris liegt sich neben mich. Wir streichen uns durch die Haare und Chris schläft ein. Als ich auch gerade am Einschlafen bin, sage ich leise und schon fast im Halbschlaf:
“Ich wünsche mir meinen alten Körper zurück.”
by Rammus fan
“Checkmate” the young girl said with a final satisfying click of her computer mouse, a smug grin, and flick of her hair. The computer showed that the opponent had left the game chat without saying anything, not so much as an obligatory ‘gg.’ Two more clicks and the girl closed the program. Chessmates Online was Catherine’s favorite pastime. Nothing was more satisfying to her than intellectually defeating an opponent. It was a unordinary hobby for a ten year old girl, playing chess.
Catherine displayed genius far beyond what was expected of others her age. Much of her personality and interests were similarly advanced. Most days after school Catherine could be found reading books that most adults would find too complex or otherwise boring, such as her older brother’s college physics books. While she didn’t always understand all the subject material, she still possessed the desire to learn. When not reading advanced literature and science textbooks Catherine liked to play intellectually demanding games. Especially games with a human opponent such as checkers, Boggle, Mastermind, Go, and of course chess. Most of these games she played online, as she had driven away many friends by constantly beating them. Most girls and boys her age were put off by Catherine’s large vocabulary, her higher skill in all things academic, or her lack of interest in conventional preteen girl and boy toys like dolls and nerf-guns.
“Cathyyyy, dinner will be ready soon! Stop playing your silly computer games and come down here to wash up!” Catherine’s mother called out to her daughter from down the hall. The young girl then rolled her eyes. She hated being called Cathy and she hated her mother’s disapproval of her time spent playing games on the computer.
“They can barely be called computer games anyway,” she thought, “I bet there are even better and more challenging video games out there, if only Mom would let me download them.” Mrs. Soulland had made it very clear she would not allow Catherine to have unrestricted internet access or unapproved games for a long time to come. “Maybe after you turn thirteen,” Her mother had said, though Catherine knew from previous experiences that maybe usually meant “no.” It was fortune that her older brother had gifted her his old computer, as it would be likely that her mother would never have bought her a personal computer for years to come if not for that. She often wondered how long she would be kept mentally suppressed like this, her ability to learn limited to the maximum number of books possible checked out from the local library.
After washing their hands, Catherine and her mother spent their meal at the table alone in a usual awkward silence. Mr. Soulland had cheated on Catherine’s mother and left while Catherine was too young to even remember him. Her brother was off at college halfway across the country finishing his last year of his degree. That left the two women to share their meals like this for the past four years. Not that there was no love in the relationship between mother and daughter, but rather that neither felt very relatable to the other. Mrs. Soulland worked as car saleswoman, a job that did not interest her daughter. The clanking of the forks and knives hitting the bottom of their bowls of chicken and pasta was the only sound that broke the silence for several minutes since Catherine had thanked her mother for the meal.
At last Mrs. Soulland spoke first, slowing her eating and speaking clearly between chewing and swallowing, “Cathy,” Catherine suppressed a wince, “about your progress report that came in…” this time Catherine actually did wince. She hated this conversation. “It said you have one B, four C’s, and a D. Why are you failing in algebra? I know that you understand the material.” She asked in a tone that was latent with annoyance, accentuating it with a condescending cock of her head and accusatory glare.
Catherine stopped eating, but turned to the side to avoid her mother’s disappointed gaze, “I don’t know… it’s stupid.” She knew this answer would only anger her mother, but it was all a part of the plan to disengage the conversation.
“It’s stupid, that’s your excuse? You told me that you are getting A’s on all the tests! Young lady if you have been lying to me-” She was cut off by her daughter.
“I do get A’s on all the tests! I don’t know why I have a D, but I’ll ask my teacher tomorrow.”
It was the truth. Catherine would often skip her homework and just perform flawlessly on the tests. Some teachers were so charmed by her achievement that they would overlook her lack of homework and give her a total grade for the class based on her test scores alone. Others would not budge and her grades would suffer. If not for her apathy towards half the school learning curriculum, Catherine would likely have been able to skip a grade; a conversation that had been discussed before.
Mrs. Soulland was not entirely convinced and raised a suspicious eyebrow at her daughter’s answer, but still relented.
“Alright, but you better have improved grades by the end of the second quarter.” She warned. She continued after finishing her last bite of pasta, “By the way, I’m going out to a late movie tonight. So your babysitter should be here soon.”
Catherine loathed having a babysitter, but recognized that adults and teenagers wielding authority over everyone younger than them was simply the way things were. Her brother seemed to be the only one who respected her as an equal.
“Okay” Catherine gave her obligatory acknowledgement of her fate before retreating to her room. It wasn’t unusual to have a babysitter watching her at least twice a week. She planned to spend the evening like any other while a babysitter was present, in her room with a book and having as little interaction with them as possible. An hour passed and there was a knock at her bedroom door. “What is it Mom?” she called out, not wanting to get up and be torn from her book. The doorknob turned and swung wide open. With annoyance at the unwarranted intrusion, Catherine turned to chastise her mother for letting herself into her room without permission.
“I’ve only been babysitting you for, like, two minutes, but I’m flattered you’re already calling me Mommy!” A high pitched unexpected voice answered.
There in her room stood Catherine’s newest babysitter. A fit looking blonde girl, her hair in a ponytail, with tan skin and expensive looking clothes, she towered over the preteen. Even sitting on her bed, with hands on her knees, she leaned over Catherine and smiled down on her like a child. Catherine immediately did not like her overly cheery and patronizing entrance.
“I thought you were my Mom. I wasn’t actually referring to you,” she corrected her babysitter, “speaking of which when did she leave?” It wasn’t uncommon for her mother to forgo introductions with new babysitters.
“Oh! Like, two or three minutes ago. My name’s Delia, but you can keep calling me Mommy if you want,” Delia said with a wink. She then suddenly reached forward and hooked her hands under Catherine’s arms before the girl could react and picked up her charge, leaving the book abandoned on the bed. “And what’s your name, sweetie?” Delia asked in the same sugarcoated and perky tone while holding up the confused Catherine.
“Uh, I don’t really like being held like this.” Wanting very much to be back in a situation where she had control over her own body, she started to squirm.
“That’s a funny name!” Delia heartily laughed before lightly swinging Catherine upwards and crouching with her fall to catch her in a cradling position, “but I was told your name is Cathy!” she said gently poking the other girl’s nose.
Catherine was no more comfortable in this position either. “Yeah, but call me Catherine. I don’t like being called Cathy.” She had since stopped squirming, resigning to her fate, and took the different strategy of asking politely, “Can I get down now, please?”
Setting her down on the bed, the babysitter relented with a disappointed groan. “You sure don’t like a lot of things!” Her babysitter was reminding Catherine more and more of why she didn’t like most people. “What do you like then?” Delia continued, “Oh! How about a game?” Catherine perked up at this just a little. Games sometimes implied chess! It had been far too long since her last in-person opponent.
“How about chess?” The younger girl asked almost a little too excitedly, already going over to her closet to fish out the board game.
“Booooring!” Delia denied with a fake yawn, leaving Catherine to turn back around with a dejected look “How about something more girly like dolls, house, or dress up? I brought some cute dresses you could try on!”
“Ugh, no thanks. I’ll just read in my room the rest of the night. You don’t have to play with me.” Catherine turned to climb back on her bed only to be stopped by a grip on her wrist.
Delia was holding her back, “Come ooooonn, it will be fun! Just one dress and I promise I’ll leave you alone for the rest of the night.” She pleaded. Clearly dress-up must be this girl’s favorite game.
Catherine considered her options with great speed. Judging by the tone in her sitter’s voice she likely wouldn’t take no for an answer, though she considered it unlikely Delia would FORCE her to wear the dress if she repeatedly said no and refused to budge. But there seemed no harm in humoring Delia’s wishes if it gave Catherine peace for the remainder of the evening, she mused. It was a battle not worth fighting.
“Alright, alright, one dress.” Catherine agreed, and was led by her hand down the hall and into the living room. Upon entrance to the room Catherine became acutely aware of the some subtle differences of the room. One was the oversized purse that leaned against the living room sofa. It was likely so large so that it could hold all these dresses and games that Delia had said she brought. Another was a faint smell in the air that was all at once familiar, but still strange and out of place. Before she had time to formulate as to why the room smelled like it did, her train of thought was broken by the feeling of Delia unbuttoning her shorts.
“What are you doing!?” she demanded, though still not doing anything to stop her babysitter due to her state of shock and confusion. She hadn’t been undressed or dressed by someone else in years. It was a foreign and invasive feeling.
“We’re trying on dresses, remember?” Delia stated matter-of-factly, sitting on her knees, while beginning to tug Catherine’s tight denim shorts down.
“I can do that myself, and you said only one- WAH!” the little girl lost her balance after reaching down to resist Delia pulling her shorts off, only to fall backwards. A strong hand broke her fall.
Delia had caught Catherine from falling with a swift hand on her lower back and gently lowered her to the ground on her butt. She wasted no time after that pulling her charge’s legs into the air and sliding the shorts off and over her sneakers.
“Better be careful little girl!” Delia warned, now reaching for the younger girl’s shirt, “Why don’t you just let me, like, take care of the dressing, hm?”
“No, really, let me do this myself” Catherine protested again, this time more sternly. Either Delia had not heard her through her muffled plea into her shirt as it was taken off, or she pretended not to notice. Catherine was uncooperative and continued to squirm, terribly uncomfortable with being so intimately touched and handled by a complete stranger as well as being nearly naked in front of one. It wasn’t long before Delia had her dressed down to just her underwear and shoes. She badly wanted to grab her clothes, which were strewn about nearby on the floor, though she knew that getting redressed was futile at this point against her new babysitter.
“Alright, wait right here Cathy.” The babysitter instructed slowly as she lifted Catherine onto the couch. She then walked over to the large bag and began to fish through it for something, leaving Catherine awkwardly on the sofa slightly shivering from the cold.
“Here we go!” Delia exclaimed as she pulled out what appeared to be a childish looking, white, lacy church dress complete with a big bow on the back fastened around the waist.
Catherine’s eye went wide with horror at the sight of it. “No no no no no, I do not want to wear that!” she said standing up from the couch, pointing at the frilly garment and forgetting all about her shivers. She began to slowly back away from the older girl. The dress was much more girly than she envisioned it before actually seeing it. It had been some time since she had last worn a dress, and for good reason. Catherine hated feeling girly, dainty, or babyish. There was a twinkle in Delia’s eyes as she saw Catherine back away, like a predator cornering its prey. Catherine recognized it as the look of victory. She was rapidly thinking of an answer to get out of this situation without going back on her word in order to have Delia leave her alone for the rest of the night.
There was not enough time however as Delia soon had her hands on the little girl’s waist, pulling her in and spinning her to face away. “Arms up, cutie!” The babysitter commanded with a tickle on Catherine’s tummy, causing her to involuntarily laugh.
Her face was red with embarrassment as being made to wear such a thing, doubly so for how easily she had let herself be made to do it. Why hadn’t she talked her way out of it like she usually does? “New opponents can be so unexpected,” she thought to herself. “Do I have to?” Catherine meekly asked raising her arms regardless.
Without answering, Delia took the action as compliance. Surely Catherine would enjoy and pretty and adorable she looked after seeing herself in the little dress. Sliding the dress over the head of the little girl she helped guide her arms into the tiny holes as the whole thing fell into place. Straightening up, Delia began tugging at the edges, fixing the sleeves, and adjusting where it seated on the shoulders.
At last it was done and Catherine was spun about to face her tormentor. The whole process had left her feeling very vulnerable and childish. Catherine wouldn’t give Delia the satisfaction of seeing her humiliated in defeat, though. She reluctantly look up to meet her caretaker’s eyes and braced for the expected gushing all adults did over adorable little girls.
“Omigosh, you look soooooo cuuuuuute!” the older girl said, beginning to rub her hands all over Catherine’s body and lifting the hem of the dress up to see the frills underneath. At this intrusion Catherine reactively began tugging the dress back down. “You don’t have to worry sweetie, no one is going to see but me.”
Her babysitter’s words gave her no comfort. The act of her underwear being on display for anyone, anywhere, by any amount, was unsettling as well as distressing. Having had quite enough, Catherine lightly pulled away from Delia who was still fiddling with the edges of the dress. “Can I take this off now, please?” She asked still masking her discomfort well to fool Delia into thinking she didn’t detest the dress as much as she let on.
“Not until you see yourself in the mirror!”
Again whisked away in her babysitter’s arms, Catherine felt herself being carried toward what she assumed would be the bathroom. It logically was the closest large mirror in the house. Her prediction was correct. Delia stopped in just inside the door frame of the tiny washroom, carrying her looking like a tiny newlywed bride. Forced to see the image before her Catherine frowned and took in the full picture of herself in the dress that was chosen for her. The sleeves were short with a slight puff to them, complete with lacy frills along the ends. The skirt was composed of a couple layers of sewn on ruffles that followed down to the edge that was also adorned with lace, which seemed to only reach just above her knees. The bow around the waist was a sleek silk and stuck out significantly on either side. All of this was in stark contrast to the sneakers Catherine wore.
Noticing her displeased look Delia nuzzled her face into the younger girl and said, “I guess you don’t like it, huh? Well you were so well behaved that I think you deserve a reward!” The babysitter smiled down at the babysat, cradled in her loving embrace.
Skeptical and confused, Catherine looked up at Delia with a cocked eyebrow that demanded further explanation.
“How about a game of chess?” She asked.
Catherine did not think she would ever hear that coming from someone else, much less any babysitter of hers. Without even bothering to respond, she squirmed out of the older girls arms and through her legs bounding down the hall to fetch the game board from the closet, her shoes squeaking along the hardwood floor along the way.
“I’ll take that as a yes!” Delia hollered after her, following slowly behind into her room.
Soon the two girls were at the kitchen table, putting their pieces onto their respective squares. Delia seemed slightly confused, “Uhm, it’s, like, been a while since I played chess, is this right?” she asked, pointing to the configuration she had set up. It was close, and Catherine quickly switched the positions of the king and queen. “Oh thanks! Sorry if I don’t remember all the rules. You can just correct me if I do something wrong.”
“There.” She said, having placed the final pieces. This was sure to be an easy win, as far as Catherine saw it. Sitting down, the cold wooden seat met her own seat and she was harshly reminded of her current clothes. She internally cursed herself for getting too excited over chess and forgetting to remove the dress. It didn’t matter anyway. All that mattered to her now was beating Delia in this battle of wits. Catherine usually held no mercy against newbie opponents and her babysitter, like all the others before her, would be no exception. Composing herself the younger girl suppressed a smile as she thought of the easy victory that lay within reach. She reached over to her knight on A2, “I’ll go first.”
The tension in the room was high after a few moves. Currently it appeared as is Delia was winning by a significant amount. Catherine was is absolute shock over how quickly her plans were falling apart. To her, Delia’s moves seemed clumsy and random with no strategy at all. However, every time Catherine went to to punish any mistakes, it became clear that each move had an ulterior motive and it cost her dearly each time. Now that she was down so many pieces, Delia was allowed to march, no matter how tactless, all over the other side of the board. Catherine could not tell if her opponent was a chess genius, just plain lucky, or both.
“I think that’s check…” Delia began, scanning the board to see if it was- “mate” moving her rook in line with Catherine’s king.
It couldn’t be true. “Wait,” She said, holding up a finger. There had to be something. Just as Delia was about to insist on her victory, Catherine took the rook with a bishop that was hidden among other pieces. She did nothing to conceal her relief as she shrunk back into her seat, dress rustling slightly. Perhaps she could still turn the tides.
“Oooh, I almost had you Cathy!” Delia said shaking her fist, her voice still ever-patronizing, “but…”
Catherine saw her mistake only too late as the older girl gently slid her queen into the recently moved bishop and once again called, “Checkmate! I win right?” She looked over to her charge to verify her victory.
Catherine remained silent as she desperately looked for any kind of rebuttal move, but none existed. Finally with a defeated sigh, “Yeah, you got me. You win.” The words were difficult for the little chess-enthusiast to say.
“That was actually fun, Cathy, I’d love to play again sometime!” Delia said as she began cleaning up the game, obviously denying a rematch. “Well, that was a long game, let’s get you ready for bed, and I’ll make us some victory milkshakes to celebrate!”
It was still some time before bed, but Catherine assumed ready for bed meant getting out of this dress. While it didn’t make sense to make a shake for the loser, she didn’t outright deny the opportunity. “I’m not allowed to have desserts on weekdays. Didn’t my mom tell you that?” Catherine questioned, helping to clean up the game.
Closing the lid on the chess box, Delia looked over slyly to her charge, winking. “Well I won’t tell if you won’t.”
This brought a smile to the younger girl’s face, and she winked back. She then turned with game in hand and returned it to her room. Catherine could hear Delia pick up the babysitting bag and follow close behind. While she was still frustrated over the loss, a milkshake wasn’t a bad consolation prize. Once inside the room, she placed the game back on the shelf of her closet where it belonged. Delia was close behind, setting the bag by the bed. The faint smell from before seemed to follow the bag, Catherine noticed. Before she could begin to formulate the origin of the smell, she once again felt herself being undressed. This time though, she did not fight it. The sooner out of that dress, the better. Delia also seemed pleased with her charge’s compliance. With her babysitter’s help the girly garment was off in seconds. Delia neatly folded the dress then lifted Catherine onto the bed, pausing awkwardly for a brief moment, and began to untie the young girl’s shoes.
Once the shoes and socks were off, Delia calmly asked, “I know it’s still an hour before bedtime, sweetie, but where do you keep your pull ups?”
That was just about the last way Catherine expected that question to end. “What?” She asked incredulously, sure she had heard her babysitter wrong.
Mistaking the context of the response, Delia rephrased, “Oh, no pull ups? Where do you keep your night time diapers then?”
Still not quite believing what she was hearing, Catherine thought a few seconds on exactly what Delia was implying. “ I don’t… have diapers. I-”
She was cut off by Delia talking while rummaging through the large bag, “Ohh, you’re mommy didn’t tell me you were out of diapers!”
Catherine shrugged at the response, still confused. Why would her mother need to tell her babysitter that she was out of diapers? That seemed implied with all ten year old girls, didn’t it? She couldn’t think of any girls her age that weren’t out of diapers.
“-Luckily,” Delia had fished a couple things out from the bag, held in each hand, “this mommy always comes prepared!” In her hands were a bottle of baby powder, and diaper that looked suspiciously large.
Baby powder! That was the smell from earl- Catherine’s train of thought was interrupted once again as she felt a rush of cool air over her privates. It was one surprise and sensation after another as she looked and saw her panties being slid off her ankles, and having her legs lifted by Delia’s amazonian grip high into the air. Catherine only regained her senses and ability to protest after feeling the soft diaper underneath her naked bottom, “What are you doing? I don’t w-”
Again she was cut off by her babysitter, who’s tone had changed for the first time that night, “I don’t want to hear it, Catherine.” Catherine was silent, still, and cooperative a moment at the harshness of her full name being used, even if that was how she usually liked it. “I deal with plenty of bed wetters when I babysit-”
It was Catherine’s turn to interrupt Delia, “But, I don’t w-” she began reaching her hands over to stop her babysitter from sealing the tapes of the diaper only to have her hands slapped away with an instinctive yelp in surprise.
“CATHERINE!” The older girl said firmly and strictly, stopping the diapering process and looking into the small girl’s eyes to show her seriousness. “I am your babysitter and you will listen to me,” She continued in a no-nonsense fashion, once again resuming to seal the reluctant girl in the cartoon-covered, plastic shell diaper, “As I was saying. I make sure to diaper all bed wetters that I babysit because I’ve had kids accidentally leak at night which has lead me to trouble with parents in the past. So I will be personally diapering you when I babysit you, just as a precaution.”
The last tape was sealed snugly around Catherine’s waist. A sight she hadn’t seen in seven years since she switched to pull ups for her sporadic accidents. She could barely comprehend what Delia was saying through her embarrassment, disbelief, and fear, all while trying to rationalize what was happening. It was then that it hit her what Delia had meant by ‘out of diapers’! It was clearly a misunderstanding in the use of the words. Catherine cursed herself for not recognizing the mistake earlier.
The babysitter continued talking as she looked in the closet for pajamas, “I know it’s still early, but I get all of my children ready for bed an hour or two before bed.” She had found a nightshirt and stepped fluidly back to the bed where the stunned, diapered, little girl sat.
Catherine desperately wanted to insist that she wasn’t a child, that she didn’t like being interrupted, that she didn’t need help getting dressed, and most of all that she didn’t wet the bed anymore. Ergo, she didn’t need diapers or pull ups. Not nice four years ago. But she dared not speak until Delia seemed thoroughly finished lest she invite more yelling or whacking.
“And for cooperating and getting ready for bed so early, and being brave by letting me diaper them…” Delia slid the nightshirt over Catherine’s already waiting arms, “I usually let them stay up an extra half hour” she finished with a wink, her good nature seeming to have returned. Delia then made another grab for her charge, who shied away slightly fearing another smack, gently pulling her into a cradling position once again. Her diaper crinkled loudly as the young girl was adjusted in her arms. Noticing the scared and confused look on Catherine’s face the insistent babysitter remedied the situation, “So cheer up! No one is here to see your diapees but me, and I promise not to tell anyone! Not ever, EVER!” Delia promised, lifting the nightshirt slightly and blowing raspberries onto the little girl’s tummy.
This did not improve Catherine’s mood or answer her questions on why Delia thought she was a bed wetter and needed diapers. It did cause her to smile and laugh intensely, losing all sense trying to futilely push her babysitter’s head away. Her muscles refused to respond through the intense tickling. By the time she was able to open her eyes and stop laughing, she realized that she had been carried out to the kitchen. Catherine then remembered the promise of milkshakes. She was set down on the ground, her diaper crinkling as Delia’s arm slid past it causing her to blush. How had she let this happen so easily? Was it so hard to say a single sentence, “I don’t wet the bed?” No, this was not Catherine’s fault. It was Delia’s fault for being pushy, interruptive, and commandeering. Yet part of her did not want to confront her babysitter. She had so far been nice enough and generous, apart from the forceful diapering and dressing. It was just a misunderstanding. Still, it was better to nip this in the bud now than let this charade carry any longer.
“Uh, Delia?” Catherine asked quietly, still minorly fearful of backlash from her babysitter.
“Yes baby?” She responded sweetly.
Requesting to not be called a baby at this point would simply be stupid, so Catherine ignored the pet name. She continued with a tone that would not come off as childish, and with a seriousness that would not make Delia think she was lying either, “I don’t wet the bed or need diapers. That’s what I was trying to tell you earlier.”
The older girl had been looking in the freezer for ice cream, and stopped dead in her tracks. Everything was completely still and quiet, save for the hum of the open freezer. Delia then shut the freezer and whipped around, a horrified look on her face.
“Oh. My. Gosh.” She began, sympathy showing in her face, much to Catherine’s relief. “I am SO SORRY!” The babysitter rushed over to the young girl and squeezed her in a heartfelt, apologetic embrace. Catherine’s face was pushed into the older girl’s bosom by a strong hand on the back of her head and on her bottom. “When I heard your bed crinkle with a plastic sheet earlier I thought you were a bed wetter. And all the children I diaper for bed complain when I insist on doing it. I guess I had just had enough arguingI’MSORRYI’MSORRYI’MSORRYI’MSORRYI’MSOSORRY”
Blushing from her babysitter’s discovery of her plastic sheet, a remnant of her past bed wetting days, Catherine avoided extrapolating on the subject. “Mphmrrrahit” She tried to respond, ending the tide of apologies. After a moment, Delia finally let her breathe, “Don’t worry about it, I’ll just take this off and go put my normal panties on.” She turned to leave to do just that, only to feel a tug on the nightshirt stop her.
“Well…” Delia began looking away, this time her turn to blush, “The thing is, Catherine, that you have to keep the diaper on.” she said, looking into the other girl’s eyes, still holding the end of the nightshirt.
“… What?” Catherine asked, not quite believing what she was hearing.
“Well, honey, diapers are expensive. If you take it off, it can’t be used again.” She explained slowly, knowing that the young girl would be outraged at the predicament. “It would be a waste if you didn’t sleep with it tonight.” Delia tried to appeal to the girl.
Catherine was silent for a moment, searching for options out of this. She stared back at Delia while thinking. “Damn her!” She thought, “She has me cornered again!” One option was to resist completely, and blatantly remove the diaper against her babysitter’s wishes. This would result in her freedom, but at the cost of an unknown punishment from an unfamiliar babysitter. Better not to risk the chance of it being worse than a diaper. Another option was to fake an accident using a glass of water from the bathroom- no no that would be a terrible idea. Lastly, it was possible to simply accept her diapered fate for the night, the plus being no further conflict with Delia, the negative being her relinquishment to babyhood. Delia once again held her in checkmate.
“Okay…” choosing the logically easiest answer, Catherine relented. Did that imply she would have to wet it if she needed to use the bathroom tonight or tomorrow? It wouldn’t come to that. She would simply take it off in the morning and throw it away, waste or not, once her tormentor had left.
Finally releasing her hold Delia brought her charge in for a more gentle hug this time. “That’s very brave and mature of you. I’m proud of you, baby.” she softly said. Releasing the hug and standing up, she continued, “Now, I have a bit more bad news,” though her voice did not imply the news was that bad, “Looks like we’re out of ice cream, so we’re going to have to go out for ice cream!” Considering on protesting due to her state of dress, Catherine was preemptively stopped by Delia, “Don’t worry, you can go get pants on. I don’t plan on showing your diaper to the world.”
Grateful for her babysitters foresight and for her decision to let her dress herself, Catherine walked down the hall experiencing the feel of moving around in her diaper for the first time. Not caring for the noise it made, or the awkward feel, Catherine kept a normal stride and pace. There were no other people around so she felt no need to be embarrassed, for now. Part of her wanted to switch back to daytime clothes if she were to venture outside, but she knew her shorts and tee shirt would run the risk of revealing her diaper. To her knowledge, the only clothes that would completely conceal the diaper were her nightshirt and other nighties. Catherine mulled over her options.
“Actually, we won’t be getting out of the car. I know a drive-thru place for milkshakes, so you don’t really need pants” Delia paused, “-if you want. I swear no one will see.”
Feeling backed into a corner again, Catherine considered the chances of having her diaper show. Looking at things objectively putting pants on would be a waste of time. If what Delia said was true then covering up really wouldn’t be necessary. She had gone out in the same pajamas before, sans diapers. Above all Catherine wanted that milkshake as soon as possible.
“Alright, you promised!” she reminded her babysitter. The two girls walked one after the other to the front door, where Delia dug out her keys from the large bag, which Catherine now confirmed to specifically be a large diaper bag, and picked up Catherine to carry her out the door. The younger girl was fine with this as the ground outside was cold and she had no shoes. Delia also took extra caution to hold her in such a way to not let her long shirt fall open.
After being situated and placed in the front seat, Catherine noticed right away with annoyance, “Hey, I don’t need a baby car seat!” then mumbled to herself, “just because I’m wearing a diaper…”
“It’s a booster seat, dear, not a car seat,” Delia countered, “And I’m not going to waste time taking it out. Don’t you want to sit in the front seat with me?”
Silently agreeing, Catherine resigned to her fate. She surmised that Delia must take care of children of all ages. Looking in the back out of curiosity, she noticed a real child’s car seat. The older girl started up her nice new-smelling electric car and soon the two were on their way to get milkshakes. In the silent time that passed, Catherine started to rethink the events of the last hour. Everything seemed suspicious, from the dress that had perfectly fit her, not to mention the diaper, Delia’s deceptively impressive chess skills, and all the clever excuses she seemed to have in order to humiliate her. However, she couldn’t guarantee that what was humiliating to her was viewed the same as from Delia’s perspective. There simply wasn’t enough evidence for Catherine to crack the case and get the answers she wanted right now.
“What flavor do you want, kiddo?” Delia asked.
Apparently they had reached their destination already. Catherine recognized it as a local owned dairy/ice creamery she had been to once or twice. Thinking quickly on what she had ordered in the past, “small mint chocolate chip shake, please,” Catherine decided.
“Make it a medium, Bish,” Delia winked at him, causing the young man taking the order to blush slightly. Catherine looked over in confusion as her babysitter leaned over and whispered, “I figure I owe you for the mix up with the diap-”
“Thanks, but you didn’t have to.” She hastily interrupted, not wanting to be reminded of what lay just beneath her pajamas. Drawing her own attention to that area, Catherine noticed the car had heated seating which felt very nice on her bottom and thighs. She had to admit, while the idea of wearing a diaper was humiliating, the actual diaper itself was more than comfortable. Waiting for her milkshake, she began to adjust, lean back in the chair and relax, causing a quiet crinkle from her diaper. This made Delia look over and smile patronizingly. Her gaze caused Catherine to fidget more and try to find a less crinkly position, only to elicit more noise.
“What?” She asked, annoyed, hearing her babysitter stifle a laugh at her predicament.
“Nothing!” Delia meeped trying her best, but failing, to spare the little girl any embarrassment. She then looked out the window to see their milkshakes were being walked out to them. “Oh here they come!” Delia exclaimed, effectively changing the subject.
The drive back was just as silent as the drive there, though this time Catherine was entirely focused on her milkshake.
Finishing it just as they pulled into the driveway, the girl let out a happy sigh after the last long slurp. The sun had been set for a few hours, and thus is was getting colder outside by the minute. Hugging herself and bouncing on her tippy toes, Catherine made a dash for the front door avoiding being carried in by her babysitter again. “Thanks, Delia.” She added remembering her manners.
“Sure thing sweetie.” Delia locked up the car with a click of her keys and marched toward the house. “Does this make me your favorite?” She asked sweetly, beginning to unlock the front door.
“Wellllll” Catherine began, dramatically dragging out the response while bounding into her home, “You’re alright.” She then quickly amended, “Apart from being diaper crazy.” for added truth.
“I guess I’ll have to butter you up even more to get you to warm up to me,” Delia accepted the compliment with a ruffle of the little girl’s hair. Setting the diaper bag down by the couch again, she stretched and laid herself along the length of the furniture and turned the TV on. Inviting Catherine over Delia patted her own stomach to beckon the girl to lie with her.
Stifling a yawn, Catherine welcomed the invitation and lay down on top of her babysitter, bringing a blanket with her. Delia wrapped up herself and the much smaller girl under the blanket, shifting around to find a comfortable and warm position. After much shuffling of cloth over cloth and the rustling of a diaper, the two girls were on their sides facing the TV, and Catherine found herself being Delia’s little spoon. To her embarrassment, she noticed her babysitter had laced her hands over Catherine’s midsection, effectively lifting her nightshirt and leaving her diaper exposed. While she was still covered by the blanket, and no one would ever see inside the house anyway, it still left the poor girl feeling vulnerable to know her infantile state was so unprotected. Every time she attempted to remedy the situation, Delia would hug her tighter and tickle the little girl’s tummy.
Feeling her eyelids becoming heavy, Catherine glanced at the clock to see she still had roughly 45 minutes left to stay up before being put to bed according to Delia’s rules. Certainly she had to take advantage of this treat and stay awake a long as possible! Despite her best attempts she drifted off into a deep sleep before even her normal bedtime. The combined rhythmic breathing of her babysitter, and her warm, comfortable embrace proved too much.
Gentle rocking motions caused Catherine to stir. Her senses were muddled from the sleepy haze that still clung to her, making it difficult to process what was happening. It became aware to her that she was being carried, presumably to her room. The next sense that came to was the feeling between her legs. What happened to her underwear? Memories came flooding back, specifically memories of the diaper. Something else was amiss, yet Catherine’s senses eluded her. “Are you awake, sweetie?” Delia gently whispered, slowly setting the girl down on the bed.
“Mmmnnnnn” Catherine moaned, unable to properly answer. She began grasping for pillows and sheets.
She was once again picked up and assisted in standing. “I need you to go brush your teeth. Then I’ll tuck you into bed.” Delia instructed, waiting for her charge to get going. When she wouldn’t, she gave the little girl a firm pat on the bottom to get going.
In that motion, Catherine was immediately jolted awake upon a certain realization. She rushed off to the bathroom as she was told and shut the door and locked it behind her. With shaky fingers and and apprehension, she looked to the mirror and slowly lifted her nightshirt to reveal the diaper underneath. It looked the same. Catherine couldn’t be certain though, not having inspected it greatly earlier. Holding her breath, the young girl reached down to feel it.
It was wet. Her first accident in four years. Though it didn’t feel or appear to be much, it was an accident nonetheless. Tears threatened her eyes at the slow realization of the impact of the accident. Catherine didn’t want to think about what Delia would do knowing she had somehow devolved into a bed wetter in a single day. Perhaps she could hide it? The thought calmed her down somewhat. Surely Delia would have said something if she knew about the accident. All Catherine had to do at this point was make it back to bed without her babysitter seeing the accident. She would then remove the diaper, dispose of it, and pretend it never happened.
Once her teeth were brushed, and nerves were steeled, she left the bathroom to enact her plan. Softly padding down the hall, her diaper less crinkly than before, she wondered if Delia would even be in her room. Of course, Delia was. “Come on, honey” The babysitter sat on the bed and held her arms out to pick up the girl, as usual, “I’ll help you up.”
“Only babies need help up. I climb onto my bed by myself every day.” Catherine said stoically, despite truly feeling like a baby on the inside. She took the long way around to the foot of the bed to avoid the trap set before her.
She continued climbing as Delia spoke, “Well you may not be a baby,” swiftly, she reached over to lift Catherine’s nightshirt up as the little girl was halfway up the bed, “but you sure look cute like one with this diaper!”
Her wet diaper revealed, Catherine resolved to keep the farce going until she was called out on it. “Hey!” She whined indignantly, tugging the shirt back down as far as it would allow. Had she noticed? Delia’s plastic smile appeared unchanged. Perhaps she had gotten away with it. As Catherine began to pull the sheets up to let herself in, completion of her plan in sight, she was stopped by her babysitter gently grabbing her wrist.
“We’d better change that diaper before you get all snuggled in.” Delia said gently and apologetically.
Caught. In the end she was not able to get away with hiding her accident. Slowly turning to look into her caretaker’s eyes, Catherine began to sniffle, wondering what would happen now. She let the older girl assume all control considering she was in no position to protest or resist. On top of Delia’s domineering diapering ways, she also now had due cause to put Catherine in a new diaper. Four years of being dry at night amounting to nothing as Delia rifled through her diaper bag to get out what Catherine knew would be a diaper and not a pull up. She decided to make the request anyway, “Can I have a pull up instead?”
Delia dumped a few items on the bed; a bottle of baby powder, a Ziploc bag, baby wipes, an item Catherine did not recognize, a folded changing mat, and a diaper that looked suspiciously thicker and more childish than the last, though it must have been Catherine’s imagination. “I’m sorry Cathy, but no.” Delia said sympathetically but seriously as she lifted the little girl’s legs by the ankles with one hand, and slid the chilly plastic pad into place with the other. “You leaked on the couch and me a little bit, so I need to make sure that doesn’t happen again.” A tinge of annoyance could be heard in her tone as she untaped the sides of the used diaper.
Catherine’s eyes went wide at being told that. She gasped as she felt cold wipes were used to clean her diaper area. What would her mother do once Delia told her about the accident? She assumed she would be made to wear pull ups, or maybe even diapers at Delia’s suggestion, every night for weeks or months to come. The horror of the notion was enough to strip away what little pride Catherine may have had left. Turning her attention back to her humiliating diapering, she watched as her babysitter again lifted her legs sky-high to slide her dry diaper into place. Before the powder however, the young girl watched Delia pick up the unknown item and peel a tape off of it and then place it inside the diaper longways. It must have been an absorbent insert. Then came the powder, which the older girl did not skimp on. At long last the front fold of the diaper came up, and the four tapes sealed Catherine into the plastic prison. Sitting up, she thought asking wouldn’t hurt, if anything, “I’m sorry I leaked… Are you going to tell my mom?”
Quiet for a moment, Delia answered slowly, “I’m going to have to. You may be sick and it’s possible you’ll wet your bed tomorrow or the next day. I’ll tell her to get you some diapers to protect your mattress.”
Catherine’s worst fears had come to fruition. Launching herself at her babysitter and latching onto her, she begged, “No!! Please! You can’t! I’ll do anything!” A few tears let loose, “I haven’t wet the bed in four years. This was just a one time thing! I promise!” She continued to bargain.
Delia embraced the crying child, rubbing her back and patting it. “Shhh shhhh it’s okay Cathy, shhh hushhhh” The hug continued like that for two or three more minutes before the older girl lifted the other away to see her tear-stained face. “If what you say is true, then maybe I won’t tell your mommy about this.”
Hope glimmered and lifted Catherine’s spirits as she looked up at Delia smiling through the slowing tears.
“You’ve still wet yourself and you’ll stay in diapers tonight,” Delia began to list her condition as she sank below the bed from Catherine’s view going through the diaper bag once again. The younger girl nervously waited above, playing with the elastic edge of her diaper. Coming back into view, the babysitter held up 3 pink pull ups, each with different princesses or cartoon characters on each. “You’ll wear these for the next three nights, just in case. That way, mommy doesn’t have to find out and your sheets are safe.”
“Thank you thank you thank you!” Catherine said, taking the pull ups and sliding off the bed to put them into her dresser. While taking the short few steps across her room, she was able to confirm the increased thickness of this diaper. While she hated it, she also recognized the logic in wearing it. For tonight at least. Suddenly, though not unexpectedly, Catherine felt herself being lifted from behind and carried over to her waiting bed.
“If you keep having accidents and use all of your pull ups,” Delia explained while pulling the covers over the small girl, “You’ll have to tell your mommy yourself that you’ve been having accidents. Okay?” She asked the younger girl to ensure she understood.
Hiding all reluctance from her voice Catherine answered, “I will. Thanks again for covering for me. You are my favorite now.” She flattered Delia, hoping to eliminate all chance of her changing her mind and relaying the night’s events to her mother.
“Awww! You’re my favorite too! I really hope I get to babysit you again someday soon!” If sugar, sunshine, and rainbows could spill forth from Delia’s mouth they would have during that sentence. She gave Catherine a little kiss on the nose before turning off the lights and standing in the doorway, “Sleep tight, and don’t forget! Be a good baby even after I leave!” Catherine groaned at being called baby for the elevendy-millionth time tonight as Delia shut the door and left her in the dark under her covers.
It took Catherine several minutes of twisting and turning to find a remotely comfortable position with her thick new diaper. Not that the diaper was uncomfortable. It was actually very soft, but still felt foreign and intrusive between her legs. She reached down to feel it, still scarcely believing the night’s events. The plastic material, bunched, scrunched, and rustled with her every touch. Catherine had half a mind to rip the diaper off right now and replace it with her normal underwear. She could not force herself to, though. She was feeling tired anyway, emotionally and physically, despite her still active mind. After a fitful few more adjustments the little girl finally felt at ease enough to drift off into dreamland.
Sleep came and went for Catherine all through the night. Her dreams were fragmented, fuzzy, and forgettable. After breaking out of her slumber for the third time that night she groggily slithered off her elevated bed and padded down the hall towards the kitchen. There the girl grabbed the drinking cup she left for reuse by the sink and poured herself a glass. A common ritual done to help herself sleep at night. Drinking down two or three gulps and dumping the rest, she replaced the cup and turned to leave. At this point, after being awake long enough, Catherine once again became acutely aware of her diaper hearing it’s loud, telling crinkle. Looking over her shoulder to ensure her mother wasn’t there, despite the low chances she tiptoed back into the kitchen. Finding what she needed, the little girl pulled out one large Ziploc bag. She would need it to dispose of the diaper and its smell whether it was used by morning or no. No, it wouldn’t be used by morning.
Carefully and quietly Catherine opened her dresser drawer and retrieved a pair of her normal underwear. She then slipped under the covers of her bed and began to slip the diaper off and down her hips. It wouldn’t budge. Delia had done a fine job of making the fit as tight as possible. The young girl lay there a few moments thinking how to detach the tapes without making noise. She had no intention of sleeping another minute in that diaper. Making her way to the bathroom, with Ziploc and underwear in hand, Catherine sat on the toilet lid and inspected the tapes in the light. Using the toilet flush as a noisy distraction, she seized her opportunity and ripped all 4 tapes off at once. While the tapes were loud, she hoped the bathroom fan and toilet provided enough cover. It seemed her babysitter wasn’t lying about the nature of the tapes. The plastic front was ruined, holes showed the stuffing inside the diaper where three of the four tapes were. It would be impossible to reuse the diaper after taking it off, like she had said. Not caring about the waste of a single diaper Catherine stuffed it into the plastic bag and sealed it. In the mirror she could see there was tons of powder residue left on her body. Using a damped cloth she cleaned up and replaced her normal panties. Back where she belonged at last. Not wanting to risk being seen carrying the trash back to her room Catherine left it hidden in the bathroom cupboard before returning to bed, where she fell into a pleasant, more comfortable sleep.
Friday morning arrived with cracks of sunlight piercing through the small holes in the blinds of Catherine’s room. She was not woken, however, until her mother knocked on the door. “Seven o’clock, Catherine! Time to get up!”
Awoken by Mrs. Soulland, the girl heard the footsteps tapping down the hall and away from her door. She stretched and hopped off the bed, her muscles stiff and unresponsive. Catherine went through her normal school day routine; shower, dress, and breakfast. Knowing her mother would be occupied in the kitchen, Catherine took the chance to sneak back the diaper to her dresser drawer. She would dispose of it more permanently, along with the pull ups, on trash day. Waking up dry that morning had been enough proof she wouldn’t need them
“How was your movie?” Catherine asked while seating herself in front of the mini omelet that was prepared for her.
“Margerie and I had a great time. We shared a bottle of wine with her brother after the movie and stayed up talking and catching up for hours.” She answered, sipping her coffee.
The mention of Margerie’s brother reminded Catherine, “Oh, is Grant flying home for the holiday weekend in two weeks? He said he would try!” Her eyes were wide with optimistic hope at the chance to see her brother.
Mrs. Soulland finished a bite of her toast and a gulp of her coffee. “You can call him after school today and ask him yourself. I haven’t heard from your brother in a few days.”
That left Catherine grinning from ear to ear on drive the way to school and most of the day there. School went as to be expected for Friday. Students and teachers alike were looking forward to the weekend. The young girl managed to talk her algebra teacher into overlooking her missing homework. The teacher still implored that she keep up with studying and at least attempt partial completion of homework assignments.
Catherine did not sit with the other students during lunch. Not that they wouldn’t have her. She simply never made the effort to join them. There were no bullying or snide remarks made behind her back, at least not to her knowledge. The neutral treatment of her made her feel less ostracized. When not finding a spot on her own, she would spend her lunch with a teacher once or twice a week. Catherine assumed they ate with her out of pity, but she still enjoyed the company. She preferred the company of the adults over her peers anyway.
Towards the end of lunch Catherine went to wash her hands in the bathroom as she usually did. Through the running water and scrubbing of her hands she heard a distinct, familiar noise coming from one of the stalls. Could it be? It must have been her imagination. But again, through the noise of the hand drier this time, she heard the same noise. There was no mistaking it. Someone was changing a diaper in one of the stalls. Casually glancing over her shoulder Catherine only saw one other pair of feet in the bathroom besides her own. She exited the bathroom, knowing the girl wouldn’t risk coming out of the stall with a used diaper while she stayed there. Still, her curiosity was not satisfied. Standing inconspicuously nearby Catherine waited for her mark to leave the bathroom. Seeing the other girl leave at last, the inquisitive girl tailed her target. After three or four minutes of reconnaissance Catherine found the girl to be Jenny, a student she shared class rotation with. There was no mistaking the bulge under the girl’s jeans if anyone was looking for it.
The bell tone sounded signifying lunch’s end. Catherine had no intention of confronting the girl about her diapers at the time. Instead of paying attention in classes she spent most of the time deep in thought formulating all possibilities to why she may be wearing diapers at school. All plausibilities seemed just as unlikely as Jenny wearing a diaper in the first place. Yet the proof sat less than fifteen feet away from her. These kinds of anomalies interested Catherine and gave her reprieve from the dullness of school.
Final bell rang and students poured from the classrooms like water to go enjoy their weekend. Catherine lost track of Jenny in the crowd and had to abandon her research. The next hour was spent leaning up against a chain linked fence near the front of the school waiting for her mother to pick her up. Just after finishing one of her assignments Mrs. Soulland pulled into the pickup area. Catherine shoved her schoolwork hastily into her backpacked and fastened her seatbelt for the ride home.
“Sorry I’m late today sweetie. Had to close out a sale. We’re going to the store to get groceries by the way.” Mrs. Soulland apologized and amended.
It didn’t matter much to Catherine anyway. Her mind was preoccupied with the excitement of talking to her brother later today and the mystery surrounding Jenny.
The woman and her daughter entered the supermarket together and immediately found the clearance rack, their favorite place in the store. While Catherine didn’t have to worry about money she had learned from her mother to always be frugal. After, disappointingly, finding nothing of use the family moved on to the rest of the store.
“I’m going to look around, I’ll find you by the checkout when I’m done.” Catherine stated, beginning to walk away from her mother and the cart.
“Alright, be careful!” Mrs. Soulland warned. She didn’t like to let her daughter run amok by herself in the store, but she was trying to force herself to let Catherine be more independent little by little.
Catherine feinted going towards the toys section of the market before changing course and finding the aisle she was really looking for. There was an entire half aisle dedicated to diapers here. Surely she would find what she was looking for, but inspecting each package proved to be a time-consuming job. It had been some time before a voice from behind took Catherine by surprise.
“Having accidents?” A teasing voice said gently.
The little girl spun about to see her babysitter from the night before standing over her, a smug look about her face. She was interrupted before she could give any sort of response.
“Delia! What a surprise!” Mrs. Soulland exclaimed as she pushed the cart full of groceries closer to the girls, “What brings you to the diaper aisle?”
“Oh you know. I have to stock up on babysitting supplies from time to time. Toys, games, diapers, etc.”
“Of course, of course.” Mrs. Soulland agreed. “I’m glad I saw you. I was actually planning on giving you a call once we got home. I have fly out for a wedding tomorrow and fly back on Sunday.”
Catherine remembered how she had declined wanting to go when her mother mentioning the wedding some time ago.
“I know it’s short notice,” The woman continued in a beseeching manner “and I know you probably have better things to do, but do you think you could watch Cathy for a day and a half this weekend?”
Holding her hand up in a gesture to stop Delia smiled. “Say no more Mrs. Soulland. I’d love to watch little Cathy. We got along like sisters last night. Right Cathy?” She called over.
Catherine was not paying attention. She was transfixed looking at the wall of diapers. Where were they?
“Catherine.” Mrs. Soulland said sternly getting her daughter’s attention. “Delia was speaking to you.”
“Oh uh yeah. Delia’s really nice.” Catherine faked her enthusiasm towards her babysitter. Truthfully she held no preference for Delia over any of her other previous babysitters.
“What are looking for here on the diaper aisle sweetie?” The mother asked her daughter in a quizzical tone. She had just now noticed the strangeness of this meeting point.
“I was just wondering how diapers are made.” Catherine quickly lied. She hoped all the talk of diapers wouldn’t cause Delia to bring up anything about last night. She had promised. The possibility still worried the young girl.
“Well, we’ll let you go Delia. Again, thanks so much for agreeing to watch her. I’ll call you later with the details.” The older woman waved goodbye and began pushing the cart away. Catherine followed behind.
The mother and daughter finished checking out and pushed the groceries across the parking lot out to the car. Catherine had convinced her mother to buy her a journal while at the store and she was already busy filling it up as soon as the car began moving. The drive home was pleasant. Mrs. Soulland played her favorite country radio station and cranked the heater up. Fall was underway and the trend of the weather began to show it. Autumn was Catherine’s favorite time of year. Autumn to her meant pumpkin pie, colorful leaves, warm coats, and best of all family holiday dinners. The loud crank of the parking brake sounded and the young girl let herself out of the car.
After helping to bring the groceries in Catherine went straight for the home phone and dialed up her brother. Every drone of the dialing tone left her bouncing in her seat with giddy anticipation.
Her brother finally picked up on the last tone. “Hello?”
“Hi Grant!” Catherine responded with great enthusiasm.
“Hey Einstein! How have you been? Play any good chess games lately?”
Catherine omitted the game with Delia last night. She didn’t want any chance of having to recount any memories of yesterday. The siblings carried on catching up for nearly half an hour talking about school, their mother, games, the new dog Grant’s housemate got, and above all missing each other. Towards the end of the conversation Catherine finally dropped the question. “So are you going to fly out here for Columbus Day weekend?”
The fact that he did not respond right away was enough to realize the answer. Catherine’s heart sank.
“I’m sorry Catherine…” Grant began. “… but I do have some good news. I shipped your birthday present today!”
Masking her disappointment the girl feigned her joy. “Ooooh what’d you get me?”
“I’ll never tell! You’ll just have to wait. It’s still a month until your birthday and you can’t open it early!” The older brother admonished.
“How are you going to enforce that?” She asked teasingly. Her interest was legitimately piqued now. “If I find the package before mom does…”
“Don’t even think about it!” Grant knew his sister was kidding but still went along with it. “Besides, I’ll know when you open it.”
“Whaaat? There’s no way you would know.” Catherine called his bluff.
“I will. Trust me. Brothers have instincts with these kinds of things.” He answered smugly. “I have to go now alright? Be good for mom!”
“I always am. I love you Grant.” She said solemnly, not wanting him to hang up yet.
“I love you too Catherine. We’ll talk again real soon.” Click.
Sighing in acceptance, Catherine returned the phone to its hook and retreated to her room where she wrote in her journal more. It would be a long two months until Thanksgiving before the siblings would see each other in person again. While writing in her journal the girl could hear her mother packing for her short trip. After about an hour there was a knock at the bedroom door.
“Cathy, do you want to watch a movie with me tonight?” The mother spoke through the door without opening it.
A movie sounded dull to Catherine. At least all movies her mother would approve of for a child her age sounded dull. Just the thought of eyes fixed on the television watching shows or movies put Catherine in a slump. Fifteen minutes of TV last night had been enough. “No thanks mom.”
“…I guess I’ll just have to eat this whole pizza by myself thennnn.” Mrs. Soulland sang, her voice swaggering away.
The door clicked open and Catherine was on her mother’s heels in an instant. “You drive a hard bargain.” She admitted. Take out was a rare treat in their home.
The little family of two enjoyed pizza from the comfort of the couch while watching a short romance movie. Mrs. Soulland made sure to cover Catherine’s eyes during the particularly steamy scenes. Catherine would complain indignantly at the censorship. It wasn’t anything she hadn’t seen before. She and all the other 5th graders had to watch the puberty/sex education video during the first month school. She didn’t care much to see anyway. It was the act of her mother deeming her not mature enough that got to her. The movie was predictable right up until the end. Happily ever after. Catherine gave thanks for the pizza and excused herself after putting away the dishes.
The rest of her night was spent switching between reading a book, playing Chessmates, and writing in her journal. Each entry in the journal was painstakingly written and took much more time than her normal writings would. Satisfied with the work she had done so far Catherine put the girly pink journal aside and pulled from under her bed a much nicer looking diary. She opened its leather cover by the metal corners to the place she had last left off. This was her real journal. The thoughts and musings she wrote on the pages of this journal were her normal style and form. In the new diary she received today, she tried her best to emulate the penmanship and grammatical mistakes of a classmate whose essays she had peer reviewed many times before. Many students sought her out in class for any sort of group work or evaluation because of her academic talent. It was nice to be looked up to sometimes.
“Catherine honey, can I come in?” The voice came from just outside the door once again.
“Sure mom.” Catherine calmly hid the black journal under her pillow and swapped it for the pink girly one.
“My plane leaves at noon tomorrow, so I have to leave around ten.” Mrs. Soulland let herself in and took a seat next to her daughter. “I know you’ll probably want to sleep in since it’s the weekend. Do you want me to just say goodbye tonight and let you sleep in? I’ll tell Delia not to wake you.” She offered.
If Delia were to see Catherine in bed without a pull up on punishment would surely follow. And she had no intentions of wearing one tonight, or the next two nights for that matter. “No, I’ll see you tomorrow morning. I won’t sleep in that late.” She said sweetly.
“Okay then. Bedtime in half an hour by the way.” The woman smiled back and stood to leave. “I’ll see you tomorrow then. Goodnight sweetie.” The door was closed once again.
“Love you. Night” Catherine quietly said back.
Half an hour later the young girl was brushing her teeth and preparing for bed like she had been told. After getting on a pair of thick sweats and sleeper tank, Catherine went over to her dresser and gingerly brought one of the pull ups out. She didn’t need it. But what if she did? Was last night a fluke? Or would she wake up to a wet bed tomorrow morning? Without fully realizing what she was doing the girl slowly began to slide her pants down. It was just a pull up. Just a precaution. Nothing embarrassing about it. She stepped out of the sweats and stared at the childish thing she held in her hands. Her pride wasn’t worth the risk. With trembling hands she hooked her thumbs on the inside of the pull up and lowered it down to her feet-
No! What was she doing? Catherine snapped out of her daze, angrily tossing the pull up aside, and put her pants back on. She then retrieved the pull up and put it back with the others. It still looked untouched with no evidence that she had succumbed to its humiliating embrace. Good. The lights were turned out and covers were pulled up to the little girl’s chin. She slowly began to fall asleep putting all thoughts of diapers and bed wetting as far out of her mind as possible. Instead she planned possible conversations with Delia and how she would disengage from her to spend her weekend in peace.
“I won’t wet the bed. I can’t,” were Catherine’s last thoughts before sleep took her.
Garbled words woke Catherine from her deep sleep. They sounded distant. Or were they underwater? “Come on Catherine, wake up!” Mrs. Soulland said, gently shaking her daughter awake. “Delia is here and I’m leaving.”
Catherine was vaguely aware of a faint dampness in her sheets as her senses came into focus. Oh no! Her mother had already turned and left, seeing Catherine come to. The little girl lifted the sheets to inspect the damage. Nothing. There was no accident. The dampness must have just been from night sweats. She did have more blankets than was necessary that night. Satisfied at another triumph of proving Delia wrong, Catherine padded out to the front door to say goodbyes. Her bare feet slapped loudly on the hardwood floor in the morning quiet of the house.
The two ladies were standing by the entryway talking when they noticed Catherine enter the room. “There’s my sleeping beauty!” Delia exclaimed, going over to the little girl and bringing her in for a hug.
Perhaps it was just her imagination, or maybe because it was early, but Catherine could swear she felt Delia tug at the back of her sweats and stick her thumb just into the waistband of her panties. As if she were looking for something.
“Alright Delia, I’ll leave the rest to you. Emergency contacts are in the same place as last time, I gave you the lunch and dinner money already, and… I think that’s everything.” Mrs. Soulland trailed off trying to remember if she had forgotten anything important. “Cathy can fill you in on anything you may need to find in the house or other small details. You be good for Delia, alright honey? You do everything she tells you to.” She said leaning down and placing a hand on her daughter’s cheek.
“I will mom. I’ll miss you.” Catherine answered with a big hug.
“I’ll miss you too. Call me if you need anything Delia!” The door swung open and the fluorescent glow of light filled the living room as the two girls waved goodbye to Mrs. Soulland.
“Have a safe trip!” Delia called out as she closed the door. The babysitter turned to Catherine and squatted to her height and smiled widely. “So did you have any accidents on Thursday after I left? I checked you one last time before I left but you were still dry.”
Of course that would be the first subject for Delia to bring up. “No. I was dry.” Catherine replied with noticeable self-satisfaction. Her voice masked the indignity she felt at having her diaper checked while she slept.
“And did you wear your pull up last night?” Delia continued her invasive interrogation and pulled down Catherine’s pants enough to see the waistband of her underwear. “You’re not wearing it right now…” She said with an accusatory tone looking into her charge’s eyes.
Pulling her pants back up and folding her arms Catherine quickly made up an excuse. “I didn’t want to risk my mom noticing so I took it off after she left the room. And no, I didn’t have an accident last night either.”
“Just like a big girl! I’m so proud of you!” The older girl stood and picked up the large, dreaded diaper bag and slung it over her shoulder. “I guess I was wrong to diaper you on Thursday and make you wear pull ups Catherine. You’ve proven to me that you’re a big girl by doing what I asked and wearing protection the last two nights.”
Catherine felt a beam of pride as she was praised by her babysitter. Even if it was based on a lie. It seems she had finally earned some respect, and the issues from two nights ago would be put behind them.
“So you don’t have to wear protection any more. I’ll take back the two pull ups you didn’t use yet. I’ll save those for someone who actually needs them!” Delia began walking towards the little girl’s room.
Fear shot down Catherine’s spine as she pieced together what was about to happen. She had to think of a way to inconspicuously stop Delia from going into her room, and fast! “You don’t have to go do that! I’m a big girl. I’ll go get them for you.” She continued with a suggestion noticing Delia’s pace was not slowing. “You can go unpack and make yourself at home in my mom’s room.” Perfect excuse!
“That’s awfully sweet of you Cathy!” Delia stopped just in front of Catherine’s room. It seemed the plan had worked. “-but I really don’t mind” She opened the door and walked in, approaching the dresser.
Catherine knew it was over by the point. There would be no getting rid of her the second she stepped foot inside the room. Time to face the music. With a heavy swallow she stepped in behind her babysitter and watched helplessly as she rifled through the dresser drawers searching for the pull ups. It was all Catherine could do but to stay quiet and stare nervously at the ground. It was another checkmate.
Delia stopped in shock when she found the right dresser. “Catherine…” She said slowly turning to face the younger girl, holding the three clearly unused pull ups in her hands. “Do these look used to you?” The older girl held them out while asking the rhetorical question.
Catherine still stared at the ground, too afraid to make eye contact with her babysitter. Fidgeting did little to calm her nerves much less get her out of the trouble she was in.
“Catherine. Look at me.” Delia then gently brought Catherine to look into her eyes by lifting her chin. “Did you, or did you not, wear one of these pull ups last night?”
Should she tell the truth to reduce the punishment? Would telling the truth even alleviate any punishment at all? “No…” was all Catherine could whisper out.
“No, what, Catherine?” The sentence was left hanging. Delia clearly expected her to finish it.
“No. I didn’t wear a pull up last night. And I took off the diaper Thursday night.” May as well come fully clean at this point. “But I was-” A firm finger on her lips silenced her.
“You’ve betrayed my trust Catherine.” The older girl’s words were slow, heavy, and sad. She reached down and began to lift Catherine off the ground.
At first she thought that Delia had been coming in for a hug. That somehow all was forgiven. That was not the case. Delia hoisted her little body over her tall athletic shoulders and carried her out to the living room. Catherine was scared and left to wonder what bizarre punishment lay in store for her. Soon Delia stopped and lowered Catherine to the ground. She still wore the angry and disappointed face that marked betrayal. Once again the little tried to apologize and defend her point of view. “I’m sor-” Catherine was interrupted by Delia putting a finger to her lips to silence her again. Before she could protest or whine Catherine felt herself being forced into the corner of the room.
There, Delia grabbed both of Catherine’s hands and placed them on the wall, making sure the girl’s nose was well close to the corner. “You will stay like that until I say you can move. Understand?” She said coldly.
Catherine was afraid to respond, unsure if the question needed an answer or not. When she felt a light smack on her bottom she yelped, “Yes! I understand!” Footsteps faded away as Delia sighed and walked back towards the hall. Left alone with her humiliation, Catherine fought back tears. She was in a terrible place. Catherine shifted uncomfortably from the awkwardness of the position she was in. On top of the corner time she was receiving, she felt terrible for deceiving Delia. If only she had worn the pull up last night like she was told to! She cursed her pride for getting her into this situation. If she had any thoughts of crossing Delia or ignoring her instructions before, she certainly didn’t now.
The sound of footsteps coming caused Catherine to hold her breath. Delia didn’t stop to dish out more punishment though. Instead the footsteps continued on into the kitchen. For the next twenty minutes Catherine could hear what sounded like a meal being prepared. She couldn’t be sure. There were bags and containers being opened and closed, the light clank of silverware, and pouring of liquids. An involuntary gurgle came from the little girl’s stomach. She hadn’t eaten breakfast yet and it was beginning to show.
Another ten minutes passed until at last Delia called out from Catherine’s room. “Catherine, come in here.” Her tone sounded less angry and harsh now.
Doing exactly as she was told, the little girl took a few precious seconds to stretch her sore body before rushing off to meet Delia. She entered her room cautiously, fearful of what awaited her. Looking around, she noticed nothing out of place except for Delia and the diaper bag. She cleared her throat at the sight of it.
“Sit down with me Catherine.” Delia patted the place on the bed beside her.
“I like you Catherine,” The babysitter said as the little girl sat beside her. She wrapped her arm around her charge. “You’re a smart, sweet, little girl. But you need to understand that when I tell you to do something, you do it whether you like it or not. I am your babysitter and I know what is in your best interest.” Her grip around Catherine’s waist tightened a bit. “I could have told your mommy about your accident and you would be wearing diapers every night. But I didn’t. I did you a favor.” Delia rose off the bed went to Catherine’s dresser.
Surprise struck Catherine when she saw Delia reveal a pull up from the dresser. Why had she put them back? Delia began to push her onto her flat onto the bed and remove her pants and panties. Catherine dared not resist and simply let her babysitter do all the work. Once her bottoms were off, the older girl patted her thighs and held the pull up open for her to slip into. Taking the hint Catherine slid off the bed and into the padded underwear. It felt better than a diaper, though not by much. The feeling of it tightly hugging her butt confirmed its babyness as memories of the last time she wore pull ups surfaced in her memory.
“There,” The babysitter said with a smile finally returning to her face. “You’re going to wear this for the rest of the day until you get ready for bed tonight. This is what you owe me for not wearing last night.”
Glad that her babysitter seemed to be happy again, Catherine reluctantly accepted the terms of the punishment if it meant no more corner time. Embarrassing underwear was something she could deal with. And unlike the diaper, this still allowed her to use the bathroom. Catherine embraced her babysitter in an apologetic hug, “I’m sorry I lied to you, Delia. It’ll never happen again.” She promised.
“I know you won’t baby” The hug was returned and Delia patted Catherine’s bottom as if to remind her of the difference in authority. “Let’s get you out of those pajamas and into some daytime clothes, okay?” Delia had already begun pulling off the tank top her charge wore without getting a confirmation. It was less of a question than a statement.
Allowing her babysitter to choose the clothes for the day, Catherine let herself be dressed in a black tee shirt and jeans; a surprisingly normal choice. She had honestly expected to be forced to wear the cutesy white dress from Thursday. Though to her dismay Catherine noticed in the mirror that her pull up would peek out of her jeans if she ever crouched or bent over. Delia then took her by the hand and escorted her out to the kitchen where lunch waited. Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches! They even had the crusts cut off. Catherine scarfed down the sandwiches while the older girl was content to eat the crusts.
Every moment was one way or the other with Delia. Catherine couldn’t quite place how she felt towards her babysitter. On one hand Delia had made more effort to interact with her than any other babysitter before. She was even kind, sympathetic, and generous at times. On the other hand Delia was also intimidating, controlling, and her oppressor. If Catherine kept in line and stayed observant she was sure she would be able to suck up and flatter Delia into being the perfect babysitter for her. A lot of adults were like that. All it would take is time. “Thank you so much for lunch Delia!” Catherine said in a sing song voice while snuggling up behind her babysitter.
“My my, someone sure is affectionate today!” She cleaned off the dishes while she spoke. “So where do you want to go today?”
“Erm, I was just planning on playing chess on the computer or reading a book today. I don’t really want to go out.” Catherine did her best to disengage the proposal. In truth, she would like to at least go to the library to check out new books and return old ones.
Ever predictable, Delia was having none of it. “Of course you want to go out! We’ll go wherever you want first, then we can go get you a better shirt to cover up this.” The babysitter said, expertly plucking the pull up into view out from the backside of Catherine’s jeans.
“Okay okay.” She tore away from Delia. “I know a couple places I want to go. The library and the downtown park. I need to return some books and see somebody.” Catherine answered cryptically before running off to get her books.
The car engine gently hummed to life and the girls began their day out. Delia had teased Catherine earlier by asking if she needed a change yet or if she had gone potty before they left. Luckily that teasing had served as a good reminder to use the bathroom for Catherine who had taken full advantage of the suggestion. In the car, surfing through the radio channels, Delia tried to find some music both of them would like. After getting rejections from One Direction, Miley Cyrus, and Justin Bieber they eventually settled on a random mixed genre station. Catherine did surprisingly well navigating them towards the library, their first stop, which Delia commended her on. It was a short walk from the sparsely occupied parking lot to the library entrance.
“Ooooo hello Catherine!” A dusty, old, kindly voice called quietly out from the main desk as the pair walking into the library.
“Hi Marta!” Catherine called back similarly. She hefted eight books onto the counter with a little effort. “Plenty of returns today.”
“Oh my! Read all of them in just two weeks?” Marta asked while she scanned the books one by one and took them to a shelf behind the desk.
“I only read seven. I hated the Hunger Games and couldn’t finish it.” Catherine stuck her tongue out to show her disgust.
Once all the books were filed away, Marta returned to face the two. “Oh where are my manners? I’m Marta. And you must be…?” The elderly woman held out a handshake for Delia.
“I’m Delia; Catherine’s babysitter-” Marta, Catherine, and at least 3 other people seated in the library turned in her direction and sharply shushed her, “SHHHH” Delia slowly held her hands up defensively. “Sorry!” Her tone corrected for the appropriate volume.
“Well” Marta broke the silence. “You can check out a full ten books again dearie. Let me know if you need any help finding something.”
Nodding and quietly rushing off, Catherine began winding through nearly every avenue of books. Her babysitter quietly followed behind. If Catherine had bothered to look she would see Delia’s clearly bored face. Still, the babysitter followed every which way that the little girl went. The pile of books she had picked out thus far was beginning to stack up. Catherine used the begrudging Delia as a pack mule for another hour before finally being satisfied with her choices. The two made their way over to Marta’s desk.
Scanning in all the books, Marta handed them back to Catherine with a big wrinkly smile. The young girl grinned back and thanked her from behind the tower or books that nearly obscured her face. The elderly woman said her cheery goodbyes as the pair left the library. Catherine hefted the books into the back seat of the car into the baby car seat and buckled herself back into the child’s booster seat in the front of the car.
“Oh! We forgot to return a book!” Delia exclaimed while grabbing for a book near Catherine’s feet.
“No no no, that’s not a library book. That’s mine.” The younger girl reached out to stop Delia from grabbing the book while she spoke.
“Oh, why did you bring it then?” Her babysitter asked curiously. Catherine remained cryptically unresponsive as the car started up and sped down the roads towards the downtown park. Despite asking several more times, Catherine would still not give Delia a straight answer regarding the book. It irked the older girl, and Catherine reveled in it. It felt to her as a sort of pseudo-revenge to annoy her babysitter so.
The car grinded to a halt in the gravel parking lot and the two girls exited the vehicle. The younger girl had brought along the book with her as they began to trek down the paved path that winded through the green park. Delia found her mind wandering as she watched children at play in various parts of the playground, seeing them on the swings, playing frisbee, or running around the playground.
“Don’t you want to go play on the play-structure?” The babysitter legitimately suggested to Catherine, noticing she was still walking on the pavement with a purpose.
The little girl responded indignantly, “I came here to meet someone, not play baby games.” She clutched the book ever tighter.
Once they had passed the play structure, Delia saw Catherine’s true goal come into sight. They slowly approached several public stone, checkered tables where four old men sat playing their games.
“Hi Smitty!” Catherine called out to one of the older men, rushing over to him with her arms outstretched for a hug. The aging man turned, seeming confused for a moment, and warmly returned the girl’s hug.
“Ooooh Catherine! So good to hear from you!” Smitty murmured in a raspy voice. “Do you have time for a game today?” He adjusted his dark, outdated sunglasses as he spoke.
“Of course I do!” The young girl answered without giving her babysitter so much as a glance for approval, though Delia did not mind. The three of them made introductions and small talk as the two old men finished their current chess game.
Once Smitty had soundly beaten his opponent, Catherine sat down to take his place. She had never beaten Smitty before and was already working to suppress her nerves. Today might finally be the day she toppled her greatest opponent. Smitty fumbled with his pieces slightly, carefully feeling the shape of each piece, and Catherine helped him set up his side of the board after hers. At last the game began. The two raged a silent intellectual war, each taking great care before making a move. They also called out the positions and piece’s names before moving the tokens. Neither player had lost a single piece even after twelve turns.
Delia noticed something odd about the way Smitty played. He would call out his move, but Catherine would be the one to move the token most of the time. The man was old, but Delia still felt it was rude that he make the younger girl do all the work. It was still an interesting match to watch. The older girl noticed that Catherine was playing completely differently from their own match two days ago. She was left to wonder why in silence.
At last some pawns and others began to be taken from both sides. It looked as though Catherine was gaining the upper hand. “A2 Bishop to C4. Check.” The little girl breathed cautiously as if even a slightly wrong inhale could throw off her game. It was obvious that she was nervous but focused. Victory was within sight.
Smitty scratched his chin loudly and looked forward, as if looking behind his opponent. “King to E5.” He said gruffly. The old man’s face betrayed to trace of his strategy. The thick glasses helped make for one hell of a poker face.
Catherine gave chase to the enemy king, putting Smitty in check nearly every turn for the next several moves. If the older man was worried, he showed no signs. Suddenly the tables were turned when Smitty called out his own check; his queen threatening the enemy king. The young girl was completely unprepared for the counter attack.
Two more moves and it was over, “Queen to A1. Checkmate.” Smitty said with a smile. Catherine reluctantly moved Smitty’s queen into place with one final ‘tack’ from the stone table. “You shouldn’t give chase like that. Not when I still had so many options.”
“But I thought that–“ Catherine tried to defend her tactics. She was cut off when Smitty held up a hand for silence.
“Forget what you think!” The old man gave his sagely advice, “You need to be worried about what I think when you’re playing! Now, do you have my prize for winning today?” He rubbed his hands together with excitement.
“Of course.” The young girl answered, “I always bring it. It’ll probably be years before I beat you.” She loudly tapped the book that she was holding.
“Don’t sell yourself short kiddo. You get better every game.” The elderly man consoled her and stood up with some effort and assistance from a cane he held.
Only then did Delia make sense of the odd old man. He was blind.
Delia silently walked with Catherine and Smitty to a nearby bench. There, the young girl opened the book and began reading to the old man. It warmed the babysitter’s heart to see such a kind and sweet scenario. She could hardly believe that this was the same girl she had punished earlier today. It gave her the slightest sense of guilt. Delia suggested they get going after half an hour of reading. “We still have a few errands to run, why don’t we get going soon?”
Catherine denied the suggestion. “We’ll go when I finish the chapter.” She had said and continued reading.
Taken back by the assertiveness of her charge, Delia suppressed her annoyance at being told what to do by the younger girl. It was her own fault for phrasing it as a suggestion rather than a command. She patiently waited until Catherine was done reading. The girls said their goodbyes to Smitty and walked back through the park to car.
The car was silent a while as it drove on to its next destination. “That was a really nice thing you did back there Catherine. Reading to Smitty” Delia broke the silence.
“Yeah.” She took the compliment flatly not knowing what to say. “Where are we going anyway? Home is the other way.” Catherine pointed out.
The car turned a corner and the destination came into view. “We’re going to do a little clothes shopping.” Delia pointed to one of the buildings in the shopping center. Two minutes later the car was parked.
Opening the car door to let herself out, Catherine stood up and felt an odd sensation. It felt as though she had forgotten a drink on her lap and now felt it spill over her pants. Shock struck her as she realized what had happened. She had an accident in her pull up. It was difficult to tell, but the accident felt like it wasn’t too bad. But that wouldn’t be how Delia would see it, she thought. How had this happened? She just used the bathroom two hours ago and had nothing to drink since then! This wasn’t an accident- it was a loss of control. She hadn’t felt it coming at all, and that terrified Catherine. She kept pace with Delia, wondering how she would hide the accident and keep it hidden.
Once inside, the babysitter led her charge over to the juniors clothing section, much to her surprise. “Why are we in the junior’s department? I thought for sure you would try to get me to wear toddler dresses.” Catherine admitted.
“Do you want to go try on little dresses?” Delia asked with surprise, making a grab for Catherine’s hand. “I was just kidding. There’s plenty of cute things for you to wear here too. As long as we can find some in extra small.” She said continuing to look the clothing racks.
The shopping trip seemed more for Delia than it did for Catherine. While Delia picked up shirts, pants, and dresses for Catherine to try on, the little girl stood by the side trying to ignore her accident and formulate a defense against any possible confrontations with Delia. While absentmindedly following her babysitter, Catherine noticed with horror that they were headed to the changing rooms. She grimly thought that changing rooms would soon have a double meaning in her case if Delia saw her pull up.
“Alright let’s see how cute you look in these!” Delia said while dumping the new clothes into a pile on the floor of the small dressing stall.
“You don’t have to help me try these on. I’ll just come out and show you after I get them on myself.” Catherine tried to push her babysitter out of the stall only to find she wasn’t nearly strong enough to force her out.
“I know I don’t have to, but I want to!” Delia shut door in spite of Catherine’s protests.
The young girl was running out of options as she saw the first item Delia was unfolding were a pair of pants. She made her decision. “Delia?” the girl said quietly tugging on the older girl’s shirt.
Delia leaned down to better hear Catherine’s hushed words. “What is it, honey?”
Nearly choking on her words, Catherine whispered, “I think I had an accident.” She fought to hold back the tears, dreading what may come next.
“Awwww, Cathy…” Delia sympathized with the younger girl pulling her in for a hug.
Catherine genuinely returned the hug. It made her feel better. Though she immediately felt worse as Delia began to unbutton her jeans and slide then down mid-hug. She stood in front of her babysitter with a wet pull up on and pants around her ankles, feeling very small.
“Oh, honey, we’ve got to get you changed right now.” Delia said as she checked the pull up. The diaper bag was unslung from her shoulder and set on the floor of the changing room.
“Right now? Catherine whispered hoarsely. The ceiling appeared to have no cameras and the stalls adjacent to hers were empty putting her immediate concerns to rest. “It was just a little accident…” She tried to convince her babysitter to stop searching through the diaper bag for what she feared. Catherine’s fears were confirmed as Delia produced the same items that she had used two nights before and set them on the bench after clearing off the new clothes.
“Let’s make this quick Catherine. Accidents are accidents and you need some new protection.” Delia patted the plastic changing mat that she had laid down.
“No! I’m not going to wear a diaper during the day! I’ll just wear another pull up!” Catherine hissed, trying to bargain a way out from be diapered. If she wasn’t able to talk her way out of this she would end up just like Jenny; with a telling bulge under her jeans.
Delia gave a short frustrated sigh and grabbed Catherine’s wrist, reeling the girl in to her doom. “Be a big girl for me, Cathy. Lay down.” Her voice became more stern with every word.
It was no use. If she continued to resist she would surely be punished. There was no way out. Catherine left herself be pushed onto the changing mat and stared at the wall in shame. She couldn’t bear to look at Delia as the older girl disposed of the pull up and began diapering her.
The changing was done in very short order. Delia had not been kidding about making it quick. Soon Catherine was standing in the center of the changing room wearing nothing but a diaper and socks, feeling very much like a doll as Delia helped her to try on various outfits. She took much care to control her movements and prevent the diaper from crinkling whenever other women entered the adjacent stalls.
Twelve outfits and twenty minutes later they were done trying on clothes. Catherine actually found an outfit she particularly liked. It was a red mini dress that halted at the top of her knees and a black canvas half-jacket. Ordinarily she would find the dress to be too short, especially for fear of her diaper poking out, but when she saw herself in the mirror she felt very… mature. It was enough to cancel out the feeling of the diaper between her legs.
“Are you sure about buying this for me? I feel kind of guilty just taking it from you.” Catherine asked while helping to fold the rest of the clothes.
“Don’t worry about the money. I know a girl here.” Delia winked at the girl to reassure her. “Besides I couldn’t let you wear your old clothes out of the store. Everyone would be able to see your… you know.”
Catherine blushed at being reminded of the diaper she wore beneath the short dress. It was still a better option than the clothes she came in with. Based on how the diaper seated around her waist she assumed it would have been impossible to conceal with her jeans or shirt. Catherine thanked her babysitter for the clothes, but was still frustrated that Delia had forced her to wear a diaper. She followed the older girl out of changing room and helped her to return all the other clothes she had tried on. Delia led Catherine away from the checkout stand to find her friend. Catherine was a bit nervous walking around the store wearing clothes with tags still on them. She expected to be accused of stealing at every turn.
They approached a short girl folding clothes. “Hey Brook!” Delia called out as they walked up to the employee.
“Heyyyy girlfriend! What a surprise!” Her unusually deep voice surprised Catherine. “And who’s this you have with you?” Brook asked as she smiled down at the younger girl.
“Brook, this is Catherine; my latest little one to look after.” The babysitter explained condescendingly. “We’re here getting her these hot new clothes. Think you can cut us a deal?”
Brook tapped the rim of her thin glasses and smiled mischievously. “You know I’m not allowed to use my discount on friends…” Brook said sarcastically. It was clear she would make the exception anyway. The girls were led to different checkout stand where there were no other customers. “Come behind the counter for me sweetie.” Brook beckoned Catherine over with her hand.
Catherine nervously did as she was told. She felt strange and out of place going behind the counter. Everything looked very different from that side. Was that what the employees saw every day? The little girl was ripped from her daydream as Brook began gently tugging at parts of her outfit, looking for the tags and scanning them with the laser reader. After each tag was scanned, the older girl would rip them off. It took Catherine completely by surprise when Brook lifted her dress slightly to find the tag that was attached to the inside hem. She was too mortified to even respond as the dress stayed lifted a moment longer and the tag was pulled off. Had Brook seen? If Brook had seen, she made no mention of the diaper.
After the items were all paid for Delia and Catherine said their thanks and goodbyes and left the store. As they passed people on the way out of the store and to the car, Catherine tensed up. With each encounter she slowly became more and more comfortable with the idea of walking around in a diaper in public. She tried to convince herself over and over that no one could possibly see it and that it was highly unlikely that anyone would hear it beneath her dress. Assuring herself of all that helped to alleviate some of the embarrassment. Looking at it logically proved to her that is was less of a big deal than she was making it out to be. But at the end of the day, she was still a ten year old girl wearing a diaper; not something to be particularly proud of.
Delia was more talkative during the car ride back than she had been during previous drives. She droned on and on asking Catherine questions about school, boys, and family. Catherine was bored of the conversation and usually gave one word answers until family was brought up. She took control of the conversation and talked about her brother most of the way home. It seemed Delia had finally found an avenue to get Catherine to be open about. Her love for her brother seemed infinite, at least. The car brake cranked loudly again as they pulled to a stop in the driveway.
“So what do you want to do now? We could play house or dress up!” Delia suggested as she opened up the front door and laid the diaper bag by the couch.
Unsure of how to respond, Catherine paused for a short moment. She had originally planned to retreat to her room and read until dinner, but Delia had so far been… entertaining. Never had she bonded with any babysitter so much before. While it was partly Catherine’s fault for never reaching out to them, Delia had made the effort where other babysitters had not. Still, Catherine owed nothing to her babysitter. The older girl would likely just find more ways to humiliate and babyify her with her stupid games and rules.
“I’m just going to go read my new books.” Catherine hefted the pile of books she carried to obviously point them out.
Not seeming satisfied Delia remained persistent. “All by yourself? What am I going to do for fun then?” The young adult whined.
“I don’t know.” Catherine shrugged. “You can play dress up by yourself.” She called over her shoulder coldly as she trudged back to her room. Catherine heard an indignant ‘humph’ from Delia as she tossed the books onto the bed and closed the door.
Getting comfortable, Catherine found a book and nestled into her pillows against the wall and began reading. The story took her mind off all the things that were bothering her: her diaper, school, missing her brother, and accidents. Turning each page lazily passed the minutes into hours. She had finished nearly a third of the book by the time dinner rolled around. It also occurred to her that she had to use the bathroom. This presented a problem. Did Delia’s rule of not removing the diaper still apply? If so, how was she supposed to use the toilet? The diaper was secured again in such a way that made it impossible to slide down her hips. Surely Delia didn’t expect her to use the diaper. Then again, Catherine had a sinking feeling that was the case. The only thing left to do now was decide if she should ask, go, or defy the rules.
With a sigh Catherine left her room and went to go find Delia. “Um Delia?” She called out trying to find her babysitter.
“Yes baby?” The voice called back from the kitchen. Catherine found her eating an apple at the table while browsing through her phone.
Leaving no time to build up her nerves, the younger girl got straight to the point. “I have to use the bathroom.” She braced herself for whatever Delia’s response would be.
Letting the words hang in the air, Delia took another crisp bite of apple. “You’re wearing a diaper, Cathy.” She said with her mouth full.
Catherine didn’t like what that answer implied. “But I don’t want to use it! That’s not fair.” She said calmly, doing her best not to sound whiney.
“How is it not fair? You shouldn’t waste things when they can still be used. It’s not a real accident if you know that you’re going. Just sit on the toilet while you do it.” Delia continued to eat the apple and carry on the conversation as if it were common sense.
An answer came into Catherine’s head. “You made me wear a diaper after I…” She paused for a moment, embarrassed at what she had to admit. “-After I had an accident in my pull up. Now you’re making me wet my protection again on purpose. That’s not fair.” She crossed her arms to show her disapproval.
The babysitter stopped mid-bite in her apple. It unnerved Catherine slightly. “Remember what I said this morning Cathy? About being your babysitter and knowing what’s best for you?”
“I do.” Catherine took a deep breath before saying what she had to say next. “But I also think you’re wrong. This isn’t what’s best for me. I’m not going to wet this diaper.”
The chair made a loud noise in the silence that followed as Delia stood up to approach Catherine. For a brief moment the young girl feared that she would get more corner time, or worse. Instead Delia squatted down to look Catherine in the eyes, face to face.
“I’ll let you wear your normal underwear.” Delia began.
The younger girl was shocked at the response. She was getting what she wanted, but the success of her actions still took her by surprise.
“-If,” The babysitter continued with her condition. “If you can look me in the eyes and tell me that you will not have another accident. That you truly, honestly, one-hundred percent believe that you don’t need to wear a diaper. Think about it Cathy. What’s worse, a wet diaper or wet pants?”
Suddenly Catherine was not sure of herself. Delia raised a valid point. She felt increasingly nervous as she was forced to stare into her babysitter’s eyes and make a decision. Would it really be so bad to wet her diaper? Delia would change her shortly after, and dry diapers weren’t so bad. She couldn’t ask what the consequences for wetting her pants would be; that would give away her lack of confidence.
“I’ll…” Catherine’s hesitation already gave away her answer. “I’ll wear the diaper.” She said in defeat. Delia once again held her in checkmate.
Something must have softened Delia’s heart because what she said next made Catherine do a double take. “That’s very mature of you Cathy. Go ahead and throw away that diaper and use the potty.” She patted the younger girl’s bottom to signify her to get moving. Delia called out as Catherine took off down the hall. “I’ll be in your room to change you into a new diaper when you’re done!”
The prospect of being made to wear another diaper didn’t exactly excite Catherine, but it was good news nonetheless that Delia decided to let her use the toilet after all. Perhaps all of her brown nosing was starting to pay off. As long as she did what Delia wanted her to do, she would be able to skirt around the rules more often like this. But that had a cost; Catherine was reminded when she walked back into her room. Her babysitter sat waiting on the bed, with diaper and changing supplies laid out neatly. Catherine approached slowly, prolonging the inevitable.
“Lift your dress for me sweetie.” Delia asked.
Catherine gladly did so, grateful for the opportunity to disrobe herself instead of Delia doing it for her. She wished that Delia would allow her to change herself, but she knew that would likely never happen. At least not any time soon. The whole diapering process was just as embarrassing as the last three times. This time however the young girl knew what to expect and instead of focusing on the dreaded diaper she stole a few glances at Delia. The older girl appeared to be particularly enjoying herself despite doing what Catherine would have categorized as a chore. She appeared especially gleeful when sealing the four tapes and straightening up the diaper. Before Catherine could formulate any more suspicions, Delia lifted her off the bed and went to work under the dress to fixing the seating of the diaper further, signaling the end of her diapering.
“All done, cutie!” The babysitter tickled her charge on the sides. “Where do you want to go out to eat tonight? Your mommy left us enough to aaaanywhere you want.”
“Out? Can’t we just eat here?” Catherine suggested, instinctively tugging down the edges of her dress. She wanted to avoid any more outings in her diaper if she could help it.
“No one will see your diaper, if that’s what you’re worried about Cathy.” Delia answered as if reading the younger girl’s thoughts. She then reached for Catherine’s hand and firmly grasped it as she began to lead them to the front door. Apparently her decision had already been made for her.
As she was strung along by Delia, Catherine could swear the diaper she was wearing now was thicker than the previous one. It assured her more and more with each step that she did not want to leave the house with any sort of noticeable waddling. Done with being polite and calm, Catherine tore her hand away before they got outside and yelled childishly. “I don’t want to go out!”
Big mistake. “Catherine lower your voice!” Delia sharply silenced the girl. “If you don’t want to go out, you can tell me quietly like a big girl.” She admonished, once again showing the duality of her personality. “What’s the real reason you don’t want to go out?” Her tone softened again as she leaned down to the other girl’s height.
“It’s the diaper…” Catherine admitted, quietly this time. “This one is way thicker than the last one I was wearing!” She asserted. She instinctively brought her thighs together to affirm the increased thickness again.
Shaking her head, Delia denied it. “You’re just being self-conscious sweetie. It’s the same as the last one I put on you. You can’t stay shut in the house all day just because you’re having accidents.” The babysitter leaned in and slowly enclosed the embarrassed girl in a firm hug.
Catherine tentatively returned it, mumbling weakly. “What if someone sees me waddling though?” She received no answer, but instead felt herself being picked up and carried off. She had been betrayed! “No! Let me go!” The girl squirmed in resistance against her babysitter, though it was difficult from the way she was being held.
The front door was opened and Delia carried the wiggling girl out to the car. “Catherine, if you don’t settle down I’ll put you in the car seat.” The older girl threatened. “You’re acting like a child.”
Still desperately not wanting to go out to dinner, diapered as she was, Catherine continued to struggle. It was a sacrifice to carry on acting like a child as Delia had labeled her, but to Catherine the small chance of escape may be worth it. Her efforts bore no fruit though as she felt herself being deposited into the baby car seat and the tight pull of the seat harness over her chest. Catherine stared blankly ahead regretting her decision to resist as Delia shut the passenger door.
The babysitter walked around the other side of the car, her shoes clacking audibly on the pavement, and situated herself in the driver’s seat. She adjusted the mirror to look back at the defeated Catherine. “Where do you want to eat sweetie?” Delia asked nicely, trying to break the tenuous silence that hung in the air. The car began backing out of the driveway stealing away whatever hopes Catherine may have had for escape from the seat.
Unsure of whether or not to bother answering, Catherine remained silent a moment. Her arms were folded and face contorted into a pout as she stared out the window. The car seat was surprisingly big and accommodated her better than she thought; or perhaps she was little compared to the seat. The thought made Catherine shift uncomfortably against her restraint as if the attempt would make her feel bigger. It only served to affirm her babyish state as she felt the diaper shift beneath her. With reluctance, the young girl apologized quietly. “I’m sorry I was being a brat earlier, Delia. Can I come into the front seat?”
A genuine sympathetic look came into view in the mirror. “Thank you for apologizing, Cathy. But you can’t come up here while we’re driving. You can sit up here on the way back.” Delia negotiated. Her sympathetic look shifted into a condescending one as she added, “You look super adorable back there though. All that’s missing is a pacifier and a stuffed animal!” Catherine blushed and looked away. Without apologizing for embarrassing the girl, Delia continued and asked again, “Have you decided where you want to eat?” They had been driving in the general direction of downtown with no particular destination.
“I guess we could eat at The Hopper.” The younger girl finally answered thinking of the delicious grill restaurant she and her motherly rarely went to.
“Oooh I love The Hopper! Good choice!” Delia said as she switched lanes on the road.
With enough prompting and pestering, Delia managed to get Catherine talking more and more as they drove to their destination. The two girls laughed together and got to know each other a bit better. Catherine learned that Delia was studying to be a childcare worker and hoped to run her own daycare someday. She was taking babysitting jobs to pay her bills in the meantime. Likewise Delia learned from Catherine more about her brother, her interest in science and mathematics, and her ambitions to play chess professionally one day.
They pulled in to the parking lot and exited the car, Catherine with some reluctance. Delia had assured her over and over as they drove to the restaurant that no one would notice anything out of the ordinary with her diaper hidden underneath her dress. While she still didn’t entirely agree, Catherine had resigned to her fate and concentrated more on making her walk look normal. With a little effort she was able to keep her legs in a normal stride even though it made walking slightly uncomfortable. Together the girls walked the short distance across the parking lot and made reservations for a table. A quick twenty minutes later they were seated.
Dinner was pleasant. Catherine had to admit that she had a great time filling up on soda and greasy food; things that were uncommon when her mother was around. She and Delia had even shared a mini dessert. Holding her bloated stomach in content, Catherine sighed happily “Ooooh I’m so full!” She slouched in her booth.
“Me too!” Delia mimicked her after putting cash on top of the receipt for the dinner. “This was a great choice Cathy. Thanks for picking it.” They lay there slumped in their seats a moment longer. “So, ready to go?” The babysitter asked, already getting her keys ready.
“Ugh, okay.” Catherine agreed as she got up out of her seat with difficulty.
Delia walked alongside her charge, putting an arm around her shoulder. “Can you make it to the car? I can carry you.” She offered.
Protesting her independence, Catherine declined. “Err no thanks. I can walk just fine.”
While walking back to the car, Catherine once again felt a strange sensation. To her horror she felt the familiar dampness of her diaper absorbing an accident. It had come so fast and without warning. She felt powerless as she tried to stymie the extent of the accident, but her bladder muscles seemed to be unresponsive. There was no way those sodas should have gone through her system so swiftly. She had only drunk two anyway! Thinking quickly, Catherine decided it would be best to lie and tell Delia she had purposely used her diaper rather than letting Delia find out later and correctly assume it was an accident.
Making sure no one was around to hear Catherine glanced up at her babysitter. “Uhm Delia? I had to use my… diaper… during dinner.” It killed her to admit out loud that it was her own diaper, but it was a necessary evil in this position. She was unsure of how else to phrase the statement than to just announce the situation to Delia and let her handle the rest.
Calmly using the clicker to unlock her car, Delia answered without even looking back at Catherine. “I’ll change you when we get home then. Thank you for telling me sweetie!” She patted the younger girl’s back. Apparently the lie had been accepted without a second thought. The babysitter then went to work in the passenger seat and began unbuckling the booster seat. “There we go, no more baby seats for Cathy!” Delia pronounced cheerily, setting the seat in the back.
Forcing a smile and a thank you, Catherine hopped into the front seat. Even being out of the booster seat and baby car seat, and in her new more adult clothes, she still felt very much like a baby due to her accident. She had assumed the worst, fearing Delia would change her in the parking lot right then and there, but was thankful it didn’t come to that. The car ride home was mostly silent as Catherine disengaged all of Delia’s attempts to start conversation. Delia eventually accepted it and resigned to using the radio to fill the void.
Once the duo had returned home, Delia ushered her charge back to her bedroom and began to array the changing supplies out on the bed. Catherine made no pleas or bargains as Delia changed her, fearing that a diaper was perhaps the best decision right now. During the changing, the young girl again observed the smaller details of the process before. She was once again suspicious at the design of the diaper. It was one she had never seen before and couldn’t find at the local supermarket when she searched the day before. Its size especially struck Catherine as strange, seeing as it fit her well and she was of average proportions for her age. She continued to formulate suspicions as Delia dressed her in her sleeper tank and sweats. It was barely past sundown, but Catherine recalled her babysitter’s rule about getting ready for bed early. The diaper peeked out of her sweats by a good two inches, but Catherine made no attempts to conceal it. There was no point in hiding it while there was no one around to see.
“Can we play chess again?” Catherine asked hopefully as she felt herself being led out of her room. Delia agreed and let the young girl go fetch the game. The game board was quickly set up compared to their last match. It seemed Delia had retained the board setup configuration as she finished her side without assistance. The younger girl calmed her nerves and began postulating strategies to reclaim her victory over her babysitter.
Deciding on an incredibly bold strategy, Catherine moved her first pawn up two spaces. Silence hung in the air as Delia deliberated over her first counter move. Her hand hung hesitantly over several pieces, yet she backed away each time. The young girl fidgeted slightly in her seat as she waited for her second turn to come. Catherine noted that Delia seemed much more serious and into the game this time compared to the last. She- wait.
Delia was making her move. Could it be? The anxiety was killing her as Catherine followed the movements inch by inch with her eyes in disbelief. The enemy pawn had mirrored her exact move, leaving the enemy king perfectly exposed for the classic Fool’s Mate. Catherine had won in the quickest possible way thanks to her opponent’s botched move. Taking time to gloat, the younger girl pretended to be preoccupied with deciding her move and perfectly concealed her grin. She placed her hand on the queen piece that would bring her victory as she glanced over at her opponent to witness the moment of realization where she knew she had lost.
But it never came. Why? Did Delia not understand she had lost? She had to have. Catherine hesitated and kept her hand on the queen trying to figure out why Delia showed no signs of despair. Was Delia letting her win? But why?
“Maybe…” Catherine thought reluctantly, “Maybe there’s more than just winning and losing.” She begrudgingly released the queen and moved a different piece.
The game went on for a long time. Longer than most games Catherine played. She had to admit it was more fun than most too. There were points when either girl could have claimed victory, but instead they resorted to wacky tactics and mimicking one another intermittently. In the end, Delia had won by cornering Catherine’s king with her own king and a pawn. The defeat didn’t feel like one at all though. It was a fun match, something she had thought was impossible without winning or being completely serious.
“That was fun Catherine.” Delia said as she began cleaning up the pieces, with Catherine helping. It seemed she was done with chess for the night. “What do you want to play next?” She asked excitedly once the game was put away.
Her babysitter’s energy was boundless. Catherine groaned inwardly. She was feeling relatively tired tonight despite how early it was, though she resolved to stay up as long as Delia would allow. Extended bedtimes were not something to be wasted!
“I’m just going to go back to my room now.” The younger girl responded. Staying out in the living room with Delia would end with her falling asleep for sure.
“But what are you going to do in there? You can’t have fun just shutting yourself all alone in your room!” Delia persisted.
Clearly Delia did not understand Catherine’s idea of fun. However, she didn’t want to tell her babysitter that she would be writing in her journal the rest of the night. Avoiding any possible invitation, the girl dismissed the question with a lie. “I’m going to go read again.”
Giving up, Delia let Catherine walk off while calling out with a disappointed, “Okay.” She then added, “I’ll be in to check you and change you if you need it at ten”
Suppressing a wince, Catherine returned to her room without a response. She threw herself onto her bed and whipped out her black diary and began writing. Pausing thoughtfully between sentences, Catherine carefully pondered each word she wrote down. Her handwriting danced with the ink across line after line. After about an hour of jotting down her thoughts, a neatly written list lined the page of Catherine’s secret journal. She reread it to herself to ensure she had not made any mistakes.
“Delia is my newest babysitter as of September 24th 2013. From the two times she has watched me, I’ve noticed several inconsistencies and oddities in her behavior which I have listed here.
- Why did Delia have a dress in my exact size the first time she watched me?
- Why did Delia buy me new clothes of her own free will?
- Why does Delia carry around diapers and pull ups in my size?
- The diapers Delia uses are a brand I’ve never seen in stores, even after searching for them. Are they special ordered? If so, then why?
- Why does Delia enforce me to use diapers when I am capable of using the bathroom?
- It seems that Delia likes to humiliate me at every possible opportunity. Maybe it’s just my imagination. But I’ve noticed the condescending look she gives me while changing me.
- Why does Delia insist on being the one to diaper me? I’m more than capable, and I don’t believe her excuses for not letting me do it myself.
The pen stopped flying across the pages as Catherine paused a long moment before making her final accusation in the journal.
- Why do I only have accidents when Delia is around?
She closed the pages abruptly with a loud thwack and hid her secret journal away.
The remainder of Catherine’s evening was spent fighting her fatigue and reading through one of her newly rented books. Her mind would occasionally flicker back to what she wrote in her journal earlier. The confrontations with Delia earlier in the day and Thursday plagued her mind, in addition to the thought of what torment lay in store for her tomorrow and the weeks to come if Delia stuck around that long.
A knock at the door interrupted the young girl’s thoughts. Before she could answer to allow Delia in, her babysitter opened the door and let herself in of her own accord. Catherine was annoyed and took the initiative to speak before Delia, already knowing what she would want.
“Could you knock and wait for me to call you in before you let yourself in next time?” She tried to conceal her annoyance, but the tone still seemed to carry incredulousness as if it were a fact everyone should already know.
“But I did knock…?” Delia answered, seeming to miss the point as she looked back at the door reflexively.
Remaining calm, Catherine tried to correct her. “I meant that it’s rude to come into someone’s room without their permission.”
Delia furrowed her brow and appeared to have something negative to say, but her facial expression changed and she apologized. “Ooooh, sorry! I’m just here to check you and tell you that it’s bedtime.” She approached her charge, reaching for the waistband of her sweats.
“I’m dry.” Catherine said quietly to stop her babysitter, though she still put her hands up defensively to ward off any potential humiliating diaper checks. “But I do have to go to the bathroom…” She trailed off hoping Delia would let her off the hook again. Her urge to use the bathroom wasn’t very strong at all, but Catherine was taking precautions to avoid wetting the bed and giving Delia further reason to make her wear diapers or pull ups tomorrow.
If Delia was disappointed at missing the chance to inspect Catherine’s diaper, it didn’t show. She straightened her posture and told Catherine nonchalantly, “I’ll change you tomorrow morning then,” ignoring the implication the younger girl was trying to convey.
Deciding to challenge her babysitter, Catherine responded without whining. “I don’t want to have to use… this diaper.” She didn’t want to refer to the diaper as hers.
“You know my rules, Cathy.” The older girl countered, “It’s a waste of diapers. I won’t count it as an accident since you told me. You won’t be punished for it.” She tried to reassure the younger girl.
Expecting that answer, Catherine saw her opportunity and leapt. “But it’s not a waste.” She said flatly. Waiting for her words to sink in, she tactfully waited to cut off Delia just as she was about to respond. “If I have to go… you’ll have to take off the diaper one way or another. The only difference is when.”
The words hung in the air as Catherine stared back at Delia, trying to think how she might respond. She searched her babysitter’s expression to glean what she may be thinking. For a split second it seemed Delia was going to deny Catherine’s logic anyway. Catherine could almost feel Delia frantically searching for an appropriate response.
Finally, the silence was broken. “I guess…” Delia began slowly, “I never really thought about it like that. You’re a smart one, aren’t you?” She praised Catherine and ruffled her hair. Lifting Catherine off the bed, Delia set her down and let her run off. “Go ahead and brush your teeth and use the toilet.”
Containing her euphoria, Catherine did as she was told and went through her final nightly routine. She now had ammo to use against Delia if she ever had to get out of a situation like this again. As she was brushing her teeth Catherine couldn’t help but smile widely. Her plan had worked, thanks to Delia’s flawed logic and her own planning and problem solving. It certainly helped her to think writing down all her thoughts earlier.
Catherine brought the unused diaper back into her room with her. She had the foresight to know that her mother may see it in the bathroom trash if she left it there. Delia seemed to understand and wordlessly accepted the diaper from her charge and stuffed it into a Ziploc and tossed it into the diaper bag. Hopping back onto the bed, Catherine laid herself down and began pulling her sweatpants off expecting to be diapered again before bed. She stopped herself though after noticing Delia had not pulled out any new diaper supplies.
“I’m going to give you a choice, Catherine.” The babysitter said, scooting herself closer to the young girl. “You said that you don’t wet the bed, but you’ve had an accident today.”
The accusation made Catherine cringe slightly.
Delia continued. “But that might have been just a one-time accident. If you think it was, I won’t make you wear a diaper tonight. But only if you are absolutely certain you won’t have another accident.”
The decision was laid out for Catherine. On one hand, she had actually had two accidents today, giving her good reason to doubt her own abilities to stay dry overnight. On the other hand, Catherine would hate to admit that she needed a diaper. She could only imagine the repercussions if she had an accident without protection that night.
“Can I wear a pull up instead?” Catherine tried to compromise. Her choice betrayed her lack of confidence.
In that lack of confidence, Delia had her answer and began to lay out the changing mat and diaper supplies.
The young girl futilely protested as she slowly inched away. “Nooo, please, I won’t have an accident. I swear!” Though she knew her pleas would fall on deaf ears.
Ignoring the minor struggle, Delia gently but firmly pulled Catherine back towards her. She went through the expected routine; lifting Catherine’s legs high in air by the ankles, positioning the diaper, powder, and finally securing the tapes, symbolically imprisoning the little girl and condemning her to humiliation. Delia checked the waistband and tugged at the leg holes, confirming a job well done, and pulled the sweatpants back up to hide the diaper and its cartoon prints.
It was all Catherine could do but to keep from blushing redder than she already was. She cursed herself for not lying in the first place. Her hesitation ended with her admitting that she needed to be diapered for the night. Deep down though, Catherine convinced herself that this was probably for the best, and tried to reassure herself that no one would know about this but herself and Delia.
“There.” The babysitter announced proudly, placing her hands on her hips. “If you need anything tonight don’t be afraid to come get me, Cathy. Goodnight” Delia said as she slowly backed out of the room and switched the light off. The door swung into place and the handle clicked loudly as the older girl left.
Once again, for the second night out of three, Catherine tossed and turned trying to get comfortable with the bulky diaper secured around her waist. Every movement, no matter how small, reminded her of the importance of her ability to stay dry on this particular night. If she awoke dry, she may be free from Delia every trying to diaper her or baby-ify her ever again. If she woke up wet… Catherine pushed the thoughts away, trying to think of other things. Still, her thoughts always came back to the diapers. Delia seemed insistent that Catherine wear them at every possible opportunity. Sleep began to take its hold on the little girl and her eyes ever-frequently fluttered shut and open as dreams began to blanket her consciousness. Catherine’s last thoughts were of how she could possibly take revenge on Delia for humiliating her so.
Ich bin Christian, mit meinen 12 Jahren trag ich nun wieder tags und nachts Windeln. Laut meiner Mutter war ich ziemlich zeitig trocken, mit 2 Jahren tags und nachts. Als ich 4 war bekam ich eine Schwester, Lene. Sie ist bis heute noch nicht trocken und sie macht auch keine Anstanden trocken zu werden. Sie geht sogar auf eine Sonderschule für Kinder wie sie. Für einen 12 Jährigen Junge gibt es da natürlich nichts besseres, als seine kleine Schwester mit den Windeln aufzuziehen. Mittlerweile stört meine Schwester das aber gar nicht mehr.
Unsere Eltern leben geschieden. Meine Schwester und ich leben im Haus meiner Mutter. Ich denke mir, dass die Scheidung unserer Eltern an Lenes Situation Schuld ist. Als Lene 2 war begann sie gerade trocken zu werden, und mitten in der Zeit trennten sich unsere Eltern.
Jetzt wo wir Sommerferien haben läuft Lene den ganzen tag nur in T-Shirt und Windeln rum. Meine Mutter Wickelt sie zwar mehrmals täglich, aber zum glück macht sie ihr großes Geschäft auf Toilette.
Mittlerweile hat meine Mutter es aufgegeben mit Lene zu irgend welchen Ärzten zu gehen, die ihr dann doch nicht helfen können.
Lenes Zimmer ist eigentlich fast noch so eingerichtet wie vor 7 Jahren. Sie schläft in einem Gitterbett, hat einen Wickeltisch und eine Spielecke die eher für Babys gedacht ist als für eine 8 Jährige.
Eines Tages hatte es sich meine Schwester in den Kopf gesetzt, mir zu zeigen wie schön es ist Windeln zu tragen. Lene war ein kluges Köpfchen und wenn sie sich einmal was in den Kopf gesetzt hatte, dann führt sie es auch durch. So plante sie eine ganze Zeit lang, wie sie dafür sorgen kann, dass ich Windeln tragen muss. Ich wusste von der ganzen Sache natürlich nichts. Sie kam zu dem Schluss, das sie als erstes dafür sorgen muss, dass ich Nachts Windeln bekommen. Nachdem sie ihren Plan vollständig ausgereift hatte, begann zu meinem Leidwesen die Durchführung.
Meiner Mutter wollte Lene gerade für die Nacht wickeln, als Lene plötzlich rumquengelte und wollte, dass ich auch Windeln bekomme. Lene wusste, dass sie so unsere Mutter am schnellsten überzeugen kann. Schließlich gab meine Muter nach und rief mich in Lenes Zimmer. Ich wollte auch gerade ins Bett gehen, da ich einen anstrengende Tag hatte. Ich hatte meinen Schlafanzug schon an als ich in das Zimmer ging. Meine Mutter hob mich gleich auf den Wickeltisch, nahm eine von Lenes Windeln und schob sie mir unter. Sie zog meine Hose aus und legte mir die Windel an. Sie war natürlich viel zu klein, aber genau das wollte meine Mutter Lene zeigen. Lene sagte aber nur, dass die Windel ja offen beleiben kann.
Da meine Mutter endlich ihre ruhe haben wollte, zog sie mir meine Schlafanzughose wieder an, trug mich in mein Zimmer und legte mich in mein Bett. Sie löschte das licht und Wünschte mir ironischer weiße, eine gute, trockene Nacht. Nun lies sich auch Lene Wickeln und ins Bett bringen.
Lene hatte ihr erstes Ziel erreicht, jetzt muss sie nur noch dafür sorgen, dass es nichts einmaliges bleibt. Und das geht nun mal am besten, wenn unsere Mutter sieht, dass ich die Windeln brauche.
Also gesagt getan, mitten in der Nacht, als alle schliefen, kletterte Lene aus ihrem Gitterbett und ging in die Küche.
Sie holte sich eine Schüssel mit warmen Wasser. Als sie das Wasser einließ machte sie sich die Windeln nass, und genau das sollte ich auch machen. Sie legte also meine Hand in das Warme Wasser und wartete. Nach einer ganzen weile war es dann so weit. Lene trug Junior Windeln und die sind nicht für so viel Mengen an Urin ausgelegt, also überflutete ich auch gleich noch mein Bett mit.
Ziel zwei wäre dann also schon näher gerückt. Der nächste Morgen kam, und die Überraschung war perfekt. Ich schlief noch als meine Mutter rein kam und ich hatte auch noch nichts gemerkt. Meine Mutter weckte mich und sagte sie hätte wohl lieber größere Windeln nehmen sollen. Ich war ganz perplex weil ich gar nicht wusste was sie meinte. Als sie mir jedoch die Bettdecke weg zog, war ich wie erstarrt. Ich hatte eingemacht und ich hatte es nicht gemerkt.
Meine Mutter zog mir die nassen Sachen aus und brachte die vollkommen durchnässte Windeln in Lenes Zimmer. Als sie die Windel gerade in den Windeleimer tun wollte, mischte sich Lene ein. Sie meinte, dass es doch gut war, das ich Windeln an hatte. Meine Mutter aber sagte, dass die Windeln nicht gerade viel geholfen haben, da sie zu klein sind. Das Konterte Lene natürlich mit: „es gibt doch Windeln in seiner Größe, oder?“ Das saß, meine Mutter dachte kurz nach, und sagte nichts mehr. Sie kam wieder zurück in mein Zimmer zog mein Bett ab und legte die Matratze zum trocknen raus. Nachdem sie auch Lene von ihren Nassen Windeln befreit und Lene angezogen hat, frühstückten wir. Meine Mutter machte sich dann schließ auf den Weg zur Arbeit und wir waren bis Abends allein.
Da unsere Mutter den ganzen Tag arbeiten ist, sorgt sich in der Ferienzeit unsere Cousine um uns. Cindy ist zwar auch erst 18 und Schülerin an einem Beruflichen Gymnasium, aber sie ist schon sehr erwachsen. Cindy macht es immer sehr spaß mit Lene und mir. Sie ist total begeistert davon, das Lene Windeln trägt. Lene wird von Cindy oft wie ein Kleinkind behandelt, das stört Lene allerdings nicht im geringsten.
Es ist Abend, wir waren gerade am spielen, als unsere Mutter wieder nach Hause kam. Sie war später als sonst zu Hause, sie sagte sie war noch einige Besorgungen machen. Ich und Lene spielten weiter, wehrend Cindy unserer Mutter beim Ausladen des Autos half. Cindy staunte nicht schlecht, als sie beim Ausladen des Kofferraums plötzlich ein Packet Molicare Windel in der Hand hielt. Cindy fragte meine Mutter ob die Windeln nicht viel zu groß für Lene sind, daraufhin berichtete meine Mutter von meinem „Unfall“ der vergangen Nacht. Sie wolle mich vorsichtshalber die nächsten Paar Nächte wickeln. Cindy sollte mir davon aber noch nichts erzählen. Cindy brachte das Packet in Lenes Zimmer, in den Schrank des Wickeltisches. Sie achtete darauf, dass ich davon nichts mitbekam.
Cindy aß noch zu Abendbrot mit uns und verabschiedete sich bei uns. Mir wünschte sie eine trockene Nacht, ich wusste erst gar nicht was sie meinte, doch dann begriff ich. Ich hatte die letzte Nacht schon längst wieder aus meiner Erinnerung gestrichen, doch zum Abend wurde ich wieder daran erinnert. Als es Zeit fürs zu Bett gehen war, kam unsere Mutter und sagte: „So gut für Heute, ihr könnt morgen weiter spielen. Zeit fürs wickeln ihr zwei!“.
Ihr zwei? Hatte ich das jetzt richtig verstanden. Ich ging einfach erst mal mit, um zu sehen was Passieren wird. Lene konnte es schon ahnen, sie hatte das neue Packet Windel gesehen, welches Cindy am späten Nachmittag in ihr Zimmer gebracht hat. Sie hätte nicht gedacht, das unsere Mutter so schnell welche besorgen würde. Eigentlich wollte sie jetzt wieder rumquengeln und unsere Mutter überzeugen mir Windeln um zu binden, aber das hatte sich ja nun erübrigt. Nachdem unsere Mutter Lene fertig gewickelt hatte deutete sie auf mich. Sie zog mir meine Sachen aus und setzte mich auf den Wickeltisch. Sie sagte: „Das ist nur um das Bett zu schützten und zu deiner eigenen Vorsicht.“ Sie beugte sich nach unten, öffnete den Schrank und holte eine riesige Windel hervor. Ich war wie erstart als ich die Windel sah. Meine Mutter legte sie mir unter und wickelte mich. Ich war immer noch wie erstart und begriff gar nicht was hier passierte. Meine Mutter hatte mir außer den Windeln auch einen neuen Schlafanzug besorgt. Einen Einteiler, in den man von hinten hinein schlüpfen muss. Meine Mutter hob mich vom Wickeltisch und zog mir den Schlafanzug an. Langsam kam ich wieder zu Sinnen, als meine Schwester und meine Mutter sagten, wie niedlich ich doch aussehe. Auf dem hellblauen Schlafanzug waren überall kleine Hasen und Nuckel drauf.
Es war ein eigenartiges Gefühl, nach so vielen Jahren wieder Windeln in meiner Größe zu trage. Unsere Mutter legte Lene in ihr Gitterbett und nahm mich dann auf den Arm. Sie trug mich in mein Zimmer und legte mich in mein Bett. Als sie das Licht löschte, wünschte sie mir, ebenfalls wie Cindy, eine trockene Nacht. Ich machte mich ziemlich schnell mit dem neuen und ungewohnten Gefühl vertraut. Die Windel gestern hat man ja so gut wie gar nicht gespürt, aber diese heute schon eher. Wehrend ich die Geschehnisse des heutigen Abends verarbeitete schlief ich langsam ein.
Nun kam Lenes Plan wieder zum Einsatz. Die Windeln sollten schließlich nicht umsonnst da sein. Also kletterte sie wieder mitten in der Nacht aus ihrem Bett und wiederholte den Vorgang der letzten Nacht. Diesmal konnte sie nicht sehen ob ich einmachte, also hielt sie ihre Hand in meinen Schritt und wartete bis es Warm wurde. Schließlich stellte sich nach einigen Minuten ein Ergebnis ein und Lene ging wieder schlafen.
Am nächsten Morgen weckte mich meine Mutter. Sie wollte sehen, ob sie die Windeln nicht umsonst besorgt hat. Es hätte ja sein können, dass das letzte nacht bloß ein einmaliger Unfall war. Doch als sie mich aus meinem Bett hob, sah sie gleich, dass es die richtige Entscheidung war mich zu wickeln. Man konnte am Schlafanzug gut erkennen, wie die Windeln schwer nach unten hingen. Ich hatte das allerdings noch nicht richtig realisiert, ich war noch zu müde. Erst als meine Mutter mich wieder auf den Wickeltisch in Lenes Zimmer brachte, begriff ich die Situation. Ich hatte nasse Windeln um. Ich hatte es nicht einmal gemerkt wie ich reingemacht habe, geschweige den, dass die Windeln überhaupt voll sind.
Meine Mutter zog mich aus und entfernte die nassen Windeln. Sie schickte mich ins Bad und sagte ich soll mich Duschen gehen und dann frühstücken kommen. Lene beobachtete das ganze Schauspiel. Sie war sichtlich begeistert von der ganzen Sache. Nicht mehr lange und sie würde meine Mutter dazu bringen, dass ich tagsüber auch Windeln tragen muss. Aber eile mit weile, vorerst reicht es, wenn die Windeln jede Nacht nass sind. Wenn sie mich lange genug Manipuliert, wird sie es auch schaffen, dass ich wirklich wie sie zum Bettnässer werde und genau das will sie ja.
Als Cindy wie jeden Tag zu uns kam, fragte sie gleich, wie den meine Nacht war? Trocken oder Nass? Ich bekam gleich ein rotes Gesicht und sie wusste sofort die Antwort auf ihre Frage. Wir spielten den ganzen Tag über. Wobei mir allerdings auffiel, das Cindy mich irgendwie anders als sonnst behandelte, sie bemutterte mich, behandelte mich kindlicher. Da unsere Mutter heute länger arbeiten muss, kümmert sich Cindy um das Abendessen, und schließlich auch darum das wir ins Bett gehen.
Nachdem Cindy Lene Bettfertig gemacht hat, war ich an der Reihe. Cindy wusste erst nicht so richtig was sie machen sollte, aber sie hatte schnell die nötigen Sachen gefunden. Sie zog mich aus und setzte mich auf den Wickeltisch. Nach dem sie mir die Windel untergelegt und mich eingecremt hatte, verschloss sie die vier Klebestreifen und hob mich vom Wickeltisch und ging mit mir auf ihrem Arm, in mein Zimmer. Hier Zog sie mir meinen neuen Schlafanzug an und legte mich in mein Bett. Sie gab mir noch einen Gutenachtkuss und wünschte mir eine trockene Nacht. Kurz nach dem sie Lene ins Bett gebracht hat, kam auch schon unsere Mutter wieder nach Hause, und Cindy konnte gehen.
Katie and I have been friends for a long time now. We met during our second year of college and are set to graduate next spring. We’ve always have a relationship that borders on the sexual. We flirt with each other and ocassionally hook up when we are drunk, and neither of us push it any further. I, of course, want things to go further than what we have but I don’t want to pressure her or risk the friendship. She is very attractive to me at just over five feet tall with brown hair barely reaching her shoulders and green eyes that could soften even the hardest person. I’ve found myself daydreaming about Katie in class before and recently realized my true feelings for her.
Katie found out I like to wear diapers a few months ago when we were drinking in my dorm room and she asked if I had an extra blanket for her to use. I told her there was one in my closet and that I’d grab it for her but she had already gotten up to go look. She grabbed the blanket from the back corner of the closet, exposing the pack of diapers I had underneath it. I was an RA so my room was a single and thought I didn’t need to hide them all that well. She grabbed one of the diapers from the pack and came back to the bed she was sitting on.
“What’s this?” She asked, already knowing what she was holding.
“Uhh. It’s nothing,” I tried to shrug it off.
“Do you need to wear these?” She look me in the eyes, genuinely curious.
“I umm, sometimes,” I lied.
“Why haven’t you told me about this before?”
“It’s embarrassing. Would you have told me in the same situation?”
“Yes, probably. You’re my best friend. I wouldn’t hide anything from you.”
“Fine. I have those because I like to wear them. I don’t need them medically or anything but I like the way they feel.”
“Oh. How often do you wear them?” She was really getting curious now.
“Pretty much when I can. Mostly at night.” I tried to give as little information as possible.
“Do you use them?” I knew she was going to ask this question. I didn’t want to answer honestly but I didn’t want to lie to her.
“Sometimes.” My face was red at this point.
“Number 1 or number 2?” She had to ask it in the most childish manner.
“I mostly wet them, but sometimes number 2.” I couldn’t blush any harder.
“Well as long as you aren’t stinky around me I’m fine with it.” She said after a minute or two.
“Th-thanks. I appreciate it. You’re not going to tell anyone are you?” I pleaded.
“Of course not. I don’t care if you wear them around me either, just don’t mess yourself when I’m around, like I said.” She seemed to enjoy talking to me about them.
This went on for a few more minutes, her asking me questions about them and why I like them and me doing my best to be honest with her. She really was my favorite thing about college.
This brings us to now. Katie had been asking me if I was dressing up for the Halloween dance at school. I told her I wasn’t sure what I wanted to go as.
“Well I’m going as Angelica from The Rugrats. I have the purple dress and polka-dot tights.” We had been talking about our favorite cartoons from out childhood earlier this week so I wasn’t surprised. I’m just glad she didn’t want me to go as Tommy. I told her to come by my room before the dance so she can change if she wants. She happily obliged.
The night of the dance came and I had decided to go as a Greek. Nothing complicated, just a simple bed sheet toga done up with a gold clasp. I figured this was a good way for me to wear a diaper under my costume without getting too hot. I put on my Dry 24/7 with some boxers and basketball shorts over them. These diapers were the best I had ever used. They were pretty thick and held a lot. They buldged so much that if my shorts were exposed it would probably still be obvious I was wearing a diaper. I wrapped the sheet around me and checked myself out in the mirror. Definitely no way to tell I had on a big, thick diaper.
Katie arrived a few minutes after I finished getting dressed and asked me to leave while she got changed. I waited outside, feeling how thick my diaper felt between my legs. This was the first time I had worn one of my thick ones out of the room and was feeling pretty good about it. Katie told me to come back in and see how her costume looked.
“You did a really good job of that.” I honestly thought she had. She was wearing a blond wig that had pony tails, a short purple dress with an orange striped shirt under it and blue tights with green polka-dots. She looked great.
“And I see you were lazy this year. Let me guess, you went with something you could wear a diaper under, didn’t you?” She knew me too well. “Let me see.”
I turned around and lifted the back of my toga to show her the basketball shorts I had on underneath. She told me my butt was huge and there was some of the waistband exposed.
“I hope for your sake you don’t lose the sheet. At least you won’t have to find a toilet during the dance.” Her last statement made me a little hard inside my diaper, which didn’t help since wearing a diaper already got me horny.
We proceeded to the dance, me enjoying the padding between my legs and her telling me she can hear my underwear crinkling under the toga. Luckily the dance would be loud and these diapers get quieter the wetter they get. When we got there I told Katie to wait a second while I got us some drinks. I grabbed two cups of punch and brought them back. She took a sip and her eyes widened.
“There’s alcohol in this!” She hadn’t been expecting that.
“Yeah. I brought a few nips in my shorts. I know how much you like rum.” I smiled.
“Well, this just got a whole lot more fun.” She was laughing.
We had a few more drinks together and I was starting to feel the need to pee. Katie dragged me onto the dance floor before I could go and we started dancing. She was such a lightweight. The four drinks we had had already gotten to her and she was noticeably buzzed. She wasn’t sloppy, just having a good time. I felt pretty good myself and got a little excited when a slow song came on. She got real close, pressing her hips into me.
As we danced together she leaned in and whispered to me, “Have you had an accident yet?” Right as she asked she reached down and squeezed the front of my toga. I was glad this place was dark.
“Not yet, but I have to pee.” I said back to her. She smiled as she pulled up the front of my toga and reached her hand down my shorts and boxers.
“Go on, wet your diaper for me.” She whispered. I relaxed and let my bladder empty into my pants, feeling her squeeze the front of my diaper as I wet. “You’re so naughty, peeing yourself in front of everyone like this. Good thing you’re wearing a diaper or else it would have been all over your pants.” She was making me really hard right now and she knew it, squeezing my buldging erection through my diaper. “I’ve got a secret to show you.” She said as she guided my hand towards her ass. I could feel the thick buldge of a diaper, only it was on her this time. I looked her right in the eyes and she smiled, leaning forward and kissing me. That’s why she was so happy to change in my room tonight.
“I have to go so badly. I want you to feel me have an accident.” Her whispering was making me harder than ever right now. I reached down the front of her tights and pressed my hand against the crotch of her diaper right as she started wetting. She let out a big sigh as she flooded her pants, shutting her eyes in relief. I pressed my hand against her crotch, feeling the vibrations from her stream. She peed for a good 30 seconds before finally stopping. I knew the Dry 24/7′s would have no problem holding her accident but I could feel how wet she was. She pulled up the back of her dress and had me feel her butt. I could feel the wetness had spread into the back a little bit. She squatted a little bit as she pushed. I could her her grunting over the music as she strained to fill the seat of her pants. I felt her mess start to pour into the back of her diaper. She kept pushing and I continued to feel the back of her diaper expand as she filled it with her warm mess. She finished after a few seconds and turned back to me, putting her arms around my waist and pulling me close. I reached back and felt her full diaper through her dress and tights while she felt my wet diaper through my toga.
The slow song ended and a typical dance some came on. She turned around and started grinding me. She was grinding me so hard I thought she was trying to make me cum. I just shut my eyes and grabbed her hips while she pressed her messy diaper into my wet padding. I was getting closer and closer to cumming with each grind. She knew how horny she was making me and I could tell she was horny also. The feeling was too much and we decided to head back to my dorm.
As we were walking up the stairs to my dorm Katie was in front of me, swaying her hips as much as possible, stopping every few seconds to let out a little fart or pee a bit more. She kept bending back and pressing her diaper into my face. She said she was holding back more accidents and wanted to wait until we got to the room to have more fun. The smell from her full diaper was driving me wild and I wanted to make love to her right there.
We got to my room and she motioned for me to lay down on the bed, face up, with my head on the edge. She walked over and stood with her diaper right above my face.
“I took some laxatives earlier today. I wanted to surprise you with something I know you like,” she said as she removed her tights and squatted down a little, touching her already brown diaper to my nose and face. She grunted a little and I felt more of her mess run sloppily into her diaper, almost exploding against my face. Her diaper made a very audible “splortch” as she continued to fill the back of it with her stinky mess. I could hear hissing coming from the front of her diaper as the crotch swelled more with her piss. Her diaper was so incredibly warm now and my hands were all over it. I was pressing my face into it while my hands felt the front and back, squishing her accidents all around her.
My dick was so hard I thought I was going to burst out of it. She started rubbing my cock through my wet padding as she grinded her diaper into my face, moaning. She placed her diaper over my face so my nose was right where her clit was and grinded hard, moaning more. She withdrew my cock and began stroking it as she bucked back and forth on my face in her stinky, brown stained pants. She leaned down and started sucking me off, moaning into my cock, making it feel even better.
She slowed down for a second while blowing me and lifted her diaper slightly. I heard another fart as she noisily pushed more mess into her diaper. She resettled her diaper on my face again and continued to grind on me while sucking me off. I was building up to the greatest orgasm of my life and she was moaning more than ever right now. I couldn’t last any longer and started cumming while she bucked harder, moaning loudly while taking my cum. Her grinding became sporadic while she drank my cum and she moaned one last time before falling off me, catching her breath.
“That was amazing,” was all I could say.
“Well, I knew it would make you happy. All I want is for you to be happy. I love you,” Katie said, looking into my eyes.
“I don’t know what to say. I- I love you too Katie. I always have.”
“I know. I’ve always known. I recently discovered my true feelings for you and wanted to show you in the best way possible that I’m 100% into this for you.”
“You couldn’t have made me any happier.” I put my arms around her and we cuddled for a little bit.
After a few minutes she farted again and pushed more mess into the back of her diaper. “These laxatives have made me poop all day! I don’t know when I’ll stop!” She was laughing again, enjoying her diaper experience.
I got her up off the bed and we headed down to the showers. I was only a couple rooms away and most of the people were gone to a part or the dance. I walked behind Katie because she had removed her tights in the room, causing her full diaper to sag below the short purple dress she was wearing. I enjoyed watching the brown buldge protrude out, exposing what a naughty girl she was from her wet and messy accidents.
We stepped into the handicap shower, which was always empty since no one on my floor needed it. I removed Katie’s diaper and she stepped into the warm water. I rolled up her diaper which looked worse than any accident I had ever had and also weighed more than any of my used diapers. She really knew how to fill her pants. I took off my diaper and stepped into the shower with her, helping to lather her up with soap and get her cleaned off.
After our shower we went back to my room to sleep. She had me change her into another diaper for fear of pooping herself while sleeping due to the laxatives. I changed into one myself because I wanted to. We fell alseep easily and I only woke up once to pee. I of course let it out into my diaper and rolled over, putting my arms around her as I fell back alseep. I had noticed the scent of poop right before I fell back alseep, assuming Katie had messed herself again while sleeping.
When we woke up I reached down and felt the front of my diaper, realizing I must have peed again while sleeping since it was soaked. Katie had her back to me so I lifted the covers and saw she had really done a number on this diaper too. I thought “more like did a number in this diaper.” I reached down and felt the seat of her overnight briefs, right where the brown met the yellow. She stirred a little and farted some, releasing another load into the seat of her pants. I could feel the warm mush rushing its way into the back of her diaper, filling it more.
I gently tapped her awake so we could get ready for the day. She turned around and put her arms around me, kissing my neck. She was already horny after waking up in a completely full diaper. She put her leg against my crotch and began grinding her diaper into my hips. I reached down and grabbed the back of her pants, feeling her warm mess as she got off into her diaper. She took my cock out and started stroking it while grinding on me. She was moaning harder now.
She stopped for a second to reach to her purse and pull something out. She unwrapped the condom and unrolled it over my throbbing cock. She sat up on my crotch and held my dick for a second before pulling aside part of her diaper and slipping me inside. I had never felt anything so good in my life and she moaned loudly as she pushed my cock deeper inside her. I reached around and felt her messy diaper while we made love. I knew I wasn’t going to last long and Katie was already panting heavily. I knew we were going to cum together as I started pushing harder and she moaned more and more. We bucked harder than ever as both of us came harder than we ever had before. She slowly withdrew herself from on top of me and laid against me while I removed the condom and tucked myself back into my diaper. I felt the front of her diaper get warm against my thigh as she released her morning pee into her messy diaper. I let go too, placing her hand on the front of my diaper so she could feel me peeing.
We laid there for a few more minutes before going to take another shower together. I was completely in love with Katie and couldn’t wait for more diaper adventures with her.
Mit zwei Jahren hatte ich es geschafft tagsüber trocken zu sein.
Und schließlich mit 2 1/2 auch in der Nacht. Mit 9 Jahren sollte sich das dann aber wieder ändern.
Wir waren auf Mallorca. Mit wir meine ich, meine Mutter, meine 3 Jahre jüngere Schwester Lene und ich. Der Ärger ging schon vor dem Hinflug los. Lene braucht seit fast einem Jahr Nachts keine Windeln mehr, sie hat aber noch ab und zu ein paar “Unfälle”, so etwa 1 mal im Monat. So sollte sie doch zur Sicherheit, für den Flug über, eine Windel um bekommen. Lene gefiel das natürlich gar nicht. Sie wollte das ich auch eine um bekomme, aber da lies meine Mutter nicht mit sich handeln.
Der Erste Abend im Hotel. Wir waren in einem recht großen Hotel, und da mein Schwester, wie schon erwähnt, ab und an ein paar „Unfälle“ hat, wollte meine Mutter sie wickeln. In einem Hotel wirkt ein durchnässtes Bettlaken eben recht beschämend, begründete sie das. Aber wie die Kleinen nun mal so ihre Launen haben, weigerte sich Lene wieder. Sie wollte keine Windel um bekommen, ich hätte doch auch keine um. Sie findet es ungerecht, bloß weil sie manchmal noch ins Bett macht soll sie windeln tragen. Es kann doch genau so gut passieren, das ich ins Bett mache, und da nützt es ja wenig wenn nur sie eine Windel um hat. Meine Mutter gab schließlich entnervt und von Heulorgien und Geschrei geplagt nach. Sie gab meiner kleinen Schwester sogar recht. Und das sie sofort was dagegen unternehmen werde.
Ich war von der ganzen Sache natürlich nicht recht begeistert, sollt ich doch nach 5 Jahren wieder Windeln tragen. Meine Mutter meinte nur: „5 Jahre ohne Windeln sind keine lange Zeit und da es nach 5 Jahren auch noch zu Unfälle kommen kann, ist es wohl besser wenn du auch den ganzen Urlaub gewickelt wirst, wie deine Schwester. Ob du sie wirklich brauchst oder benutzt ist ja erst mal unwichtig. Hauptsache ist doch, dass das Bett trocken bleibt.“
Meine Mutter lies uns kurz alleine und ging noch mal in den Hotelladen. Sie sagte sie braucht noch etwas. Als sie wiederkam hatte sie ein Packet Pampers Extra Large mit. Meine Mutter sagte: „Da dir die Windeln deiner Schwester zu klein sind und wir auch nicht genug Windeln für euch beide mithaben, habe ich dir dein eigenes Packet besorgt. Das reicht auf jeden fall für die nächste 3 Wochen.“ Lene lies sich daraufhin natürlich ohne Umstände wickeln, sie hatte ja sogar mehr erreicht als sie wollte. Damit war nun beschlossen das ich die nächsten drei Urlaubswochen jeden Abend eine Windel um bekomme. Was mit den restlichen Windeln ist bleibt noch ungeklärt.
Nachdem ich noch einmal auf der Toilette war, musste ich mich also nackt auf Lenes Wickelunterlage legen. Das kalte Gummi auf der Haut war ein interessantes Gefühl. Gepudert und geölt wie ein Kleinkind senkte ich meinen Allerwertesten in die Windel. Sie passten mir erstaunlicherweise tatsächlich. Es war mir so peinlich und ich war den Tränen nahe, als ich von meiner Mutter fertig verpackt, betrachtet wurde. Meine Mutter meinte: „Da werden alte Erinnerungen wach. Das war doch noch eine schöne Zeit, jetzt hab ich nicht nur ein Wickelkind sondern gleich zwei.“
Früher hatte ich Lene immer geärgert, weil sie noch Windeln brauchte, und jetzt musste ich selber welche tragen. Lene gefiel allerdings was sie sah. Sie meinte das ich gleich viel jünger aussehe, so verpackt in Windeln. Da es sehr warm war schlief ich nur in Windeln. Lene wollte das es sich für mich wenigstens Lohnt Windeln um zu haben. Sie müssten doch auch nützlich sein. Intrigant talentiert, wie meine kleine Schwester ist, hatte sie schnell eine Lösung dafür gefunden. Mitten in der Nacht, wo alles schon schlief, holte sie sich eine Schale mit heißem Wasser und hielt meine Hand hinein. Und nach einer ganzen Weile stellte sich tatsächlich Erfolg ein. Ihr Ergebnis zeigte sich deutlich an der verfärbten Windel.
Tja, der nächste morgen kam und Lene und ich waren nass. Meine Mutter war überrascht! Nicht wegen Lene, wegen meiner Wenigkeit. Ich konnte mir mein Missgeschick nicht recht erklären. Lene hatte es gefallen mich in vollen Windeln zu sehen und mich so wie ein Baby hinzustellen. So sorgte sie nun dafür, dass ich jede Nacht nasse Windeln hatte. Tagsüber wurde es mit dem Wasserhalten auch immer schlimmer bei mir. Einmal hatte ich, so gut wie ohne es zu Merken, beim Baden eingemacht. Zum Glück konnte man aber nichts sehen.
So kam dann nach drei Wochen Urlaubt der Tag des Abfluges.
Auf dem Flughafen wollte meine Mutter Lene wieder wickeln, damit sie den Flug über eine Windel um hat. Lene erhob natürlich, wie sollte es auch anders sein, Einspruch. Sie hatte den ganzen Urlaub über nur zwei mal eingemacht und ich jede Nacht. Meine Mutter lies sich schnell davon überzeugen mir jetzt auch für den Flug Windeln anzulegen, wir haben ja noch genug. So wurde ich dann mit in den Wickelraum geschliffen. Ich kam mir richtig vor wie ein Kleinkind. Auf einem Wickeltisch liegen und gewickelt werden, und das auch noch unter den Blicken von anderen Müttern.
Auf dem Rückflug habe ich die ganzen zwei Stunden fast nur geschlafen. Als wir aus dem Flugzeug gestiegen sind, sagte ich meiner Mutter, dass ich diese blöden Windeln endlich loswerden will.
Sie meinte aber nur: „Das können wir zu Hause machen! Die eine Stunde Autofahrt, wird sie dich schon nicht stören.“ Also gingen wir, ohne den Umweg über den Wickelraum zu nehmen, zum Auto. Nach etwa einer halben Stunde fahrt meldete sich meine Blase. Doch bloß leider etwas zu spät. Als ich meiner Mutter sagte, dass ich dringend auf Toilette muss, wurde ich schon durch das Laufen des Urins unterbrochen. Meine Mutter sah mir natürlich sofort an was los ist, während meine Schwester zum Glück schlief.
Nach einer weiteren halben Stunde waren wir dann endlich wieder zu Hause. Und ich sollte endlich diese nassen Windeln loswerden. Als erstes wurde meine Schwester gewickelt, die natürlich froh war, dass sie jetzt für lange Zeit keine Windeln mehr tragen muss. Dann kam ich an die Reihe. Als meine Schwester sah, dass meine Windel nass ist, konnte sie sich einen Kommentar nicht verkeifen: „Wer ist denn nu hier das Baby, was Windeln braucht?“ Als ich dachte, das nun endlich alles vorbei sei, kam meine Mutter plötzlich mit einer neuen Windel an. Sie puderte und wickelte mich neu. Als ich fragen wollte was das soll, bekam ich nur als Antwort: „Was ist, wenn du tagsüber zu Hause, wieder wie vorhin, einmachst? Ich hab keine Lust deine Sachen ständig zu waschen. Und den Möbeln bekommt das auch nicht. Die Windeln bekommst du jetzt so lange um, bis du dich wieder unter Kontrolle hast.“ Somit stand auch fest, dass ich heut Abend auch wieder eine um bekomme.
Meine Schwester war davon natürlich sofort begeistert. Endlich hat sie etwas, womit sie ihren großen Bruder aufziehen kann. Sie fragte sich allerdings, ob diese Nacht etwas geschehen wird? Sie konnte mich ja nicht beeinflussen. Diesen Abend waren die Rollen vertauscht, jetzt war ich das Baby was Windeln um bekommt.
Der nächste Morgen kam. Zur Freude von Lene hatte es sich bezahlt gemacht, dass sie bei mir jede Nacht für eine volle Windel gesorgt hat. Nun war ich wirklich Bettnässer. Nach 5 Jahren voller Kontrolle über meine Blase, war nun alles wieder zunichte gemacht. Ich weis gar nicht mehr, wie ich damals überhaupt trocken geworden bin. Wenn ich es nicht mehr weiß, wie soll ich dann jemals wieder trocken werden. Meine Mutter hatte insgeheim gehofft, das es nur an dem verändertem Klima lag, aber ihre Vermutung wurde nicht bestätigt.
“You really do believe in this stuff, don’t you,” said Jenny. She had just entered her girlfriend’s bedroom for the first time. It was a rather spacious room on the second floor of a townhouse that Sally (the girlfriend) rented. Jenny was making note of all the pentagrams, wands, and various other magic related items that decorated the walls and shelves. It really didn’t surprise Jenny all that much. In fact they had both met in a class about the history of witchcraft in the Western world, and it was obvious that sally took a much stronger interest in it than Jenny, who only took it to fulfill graduation requirements.
“So what if I do?” asked Sally sharply.
“Well it’s just that you’re giving all this money to a bunch of con artists who know this stuff doesn’t work. I mean look at this,” she said as she picked up a wand, “it’s made of plastic! It still has a “Made in China” sticker on it!”
“The material of a wand really isn’t the important part, you know. You wouldn’t believe some of the spells I’ve cast with that.”
Jenny realized that she was being pretty rude to her host, so she decided to lighten the mood a little bit.
“Well feel free to cast a spell on me with it any day,” she said as she winked.
“Are you sure you want me to do that?” asked Sally, who was clearly happy with the change in conversational tone.
“Yeah, go ahead and cast something real kinky.”
Sally shrugged. “If that’s what you want.” She picked up the wand, waved it about, and muttered something that Jenny could not quite make out.
“So what did that do?” asked Jenny.
“It made it so that you’re a baby and I’m your mommy,” said Sally nonchalantly.
Jenny didn’t mind a little role playing once in a while, even if the subject happened to be a bit weird. This may just be fun, she thought.
“So what does ‘Mommy’ want to do to her ‘baby’?” asked Jenny seductively.
“Well first of all, we need to change you out of that shirt. It doesn’t fit a baby at all. Raise your arms so mommy can get you out of it.”
Jenny raised her arms, and her “mommy” slipped off her shirt. This is a good sign, Jenny thought.
“A bra!?” Sally said in mock surprise. “Babies don’t wear bras! Let Mommy take that silly thing off you.” Jenny gave her a sexy look as Sally undid her bra and threw it on the floor. Jenny was definitely growing to like this.
“Those jeans really don’t fit a baby either,” Sally said as she unzipped them and pulled them off her baby. “Big girl panties, too? Silly girl, babies don’t wear big girl panties! Let’s get those off you before you wet the bed.”
Jenny was clearly enjoying herself at this point, and she struck a seductive pose as soon as she was nude, but she found that her mommy was too busy rummaging through her bag to take much notice.
“Here we are,” she said as she pulled something white out of her bag. Jenny was a bit confused.
“Is- is that a diaper? This is getting kind of weird.”
“Don’t be silly! You’re a baby, and babies wear diapers,” said Sally as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. Well, Jenny thought, I guess it’s not that bad, and I don’t want Sally-Mommy to be upset.
“You’re not going to try to make me crap my pants or anything, are you?” said Jenny as she reluctantly reached for the diaper.
“Ew, no. Poop is gross,” Sally said as she pulled the diaper away from Jenny. “And babies don’t put their own diapers on. Their mommies do it for them. Now lie back down and raise your cute little butt.”
Well as long as it doesn’t get gross, I guess I can indulge Mommy a little, Jenny thought as she followed instructions.
After she was all taped up, Jenny took a look at herself and was surprised to find that the diaper had Sesame Street characters on it. In fact, it looked just like a baby’s diaper, only large enough to fit her. Sally then came back with a bright pink T-shirt, and Jenny raised her arms up and let it be put on her without any prompting. Sally then finished off the look by putting Jenny’s hair up in pig tails.
Jenny took a look at herself in the mirror. “You sure I look babyish enough for you?” she joked. Sally didn’t laugh. In fact, she began to look concerned, and she studied Jenny quietly for a moment.
“No, it’s still not quite right,” she said all too seriously. “Maybe we should head to the mall. They have a Babies R Us there, and I’m sure they’d have something that would make you look absolutely adorable.”
“W-what?” Jenny replied shocked. Surely her mommy didn’t mean she was to leave the house dressed like this, right? “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“Nonsense. You need clothes that suit you better. Come on, let’s go.”
“There’s no chance in Hell that I’m going anywhere dressed like this!”
“Silly girl, you know that babies go wherever their mommies take them whether they want to go or not. Besides, if you’re a good girl, I’ll buy you a toy. Babies love toys.”
Damn it, Jenny thought. She’s right, I don’t have a choice in the matter. And that toy thing was starting to sound pretty nice for some reason.
“Well I’m getting changed out of this diaper first.”
“Good girls don’t take their diapers off. You don’t want to be a bad girl, do you? Bad girls don’t get toys”
As much as she hated to admit it, Jenny did really want a toy, but even without that, she knew she would feel horribly guilty if she was bad.
“Well….alright, just let me put some pants on”
“Babies don’t dress themselves. They wear whatever their mommies put on them. Now seriously, let’s get going.”
Jenny was in shock. As horribly embarrassing as this whole trip sounded, her mommy’s logic was flawless. She was a baby, and babies wear what their mother’s put on them and go where their mothers bring them. She was so occupied trying to figure out a way around it that she just followed her mommy silently through the house to the entrance. She didn’t even notice Sally mention how babies couldn’t tie shoes as she put some on Jenny’s feet. She finally snapped back to reality when Sally opened the door. Jenny froze. She couldn’t go outside looking like this.
Sally was unlocking the car when she looked back and noticed that her baby hadn’t followed. “I’m going to count to three, and if you haven’t come out, closed the door and entered the car by the time I get to three, you’ll be in BIG trouble! One…” Jenny shot out and ran to the car, all the while attempting to pull her shirt down to cover up her diaper. It didn’t work very well. Sally giggled, thinking that her baby looked so cute when she was embarrassed like that.
On the car ride there, the emotional impact of going out in public like this really hit Jenny, and she started to cry. Sally reached into her purse, pulled something out, and jammed it into Jenny’s mouth before she could see what it was. “Babies habitually suck on pacifiers. They make babies calm down and feel a lot better when they’re upset.” Jenny found that her mommy was right, and she soon stopped crying, though she still dreaded what was to come.
When they arrived at the mall, Jenny again tried to cover her diaper with her shirt, but her mommy pointed out that babies don’t cover themselves for the sake of preserving their modesty, so Jenny knew that she had to let everything show. As she walked through the parking lot, everyone seemed to be staring at her, and she noticed at least one child point, only to be scolded by his mother. Jenny was beat red by the time she got to the entrance, and she would have been crying if she didn’t have a pacifier to calm her down.
“Mommy ebweone-” Jenny pulled the pacifier out of her mouth. “Everyone’s staring at me! They think I’m some sort of freak!”
“Now honey, mommies love their babies and would never take them anywhere where people would think of them like that. Everyone here only sees you for the adorable little baby that you are. No one here will think how we look or act is particularly strange.” Jenny noticed that her mommy waved that silly plastic wand when she said that last part (as if that could actually cast a spell, Jenny thought), and she seemed to say it rather loudly yet without really raising her voice. Instantly, Jenny noticed that most people stopped staring, and an old woman who had been giving her a horrified look smiled and walked over to them.
“You’re daughter is adorable!” she said as she pinched Jenny’s cheek.
“Why thank you. It can be tough being an unwed teenage mother, but looking at her cute little face makes it all worth it.” Jenny thought about that statement as the two continued talking. Something seemed strange about what she had said. Her mommy was 19, wasn’t married, and definitely was her mommy, but something nagged at her about it. Her thoughts were interrupted by the woman patting her on the head.
“Now be a good girl for you mommy, dear,” she said as she walked off.
After she was out of earshot, Jenny said “She was kind of weird.”
Sally looked at her quizzically. “You think it’s weird for an old woman to treat a baby like a baby?”
Jenny thought about that for a second and decided that her mother was right. The woman’s actions really were not particularly unusual. It was then that she noticed that they were passing by a toy store. Jenny lightened up, and for the first time since she was diapered, she was honestly excited about something. Sally noticed.
“Do you want to look at the toys for a minute before we get you some clothes?”
Jenny nodded vigorously.
“Alright, I guess we can take a short look,” she said as she smiled. Jenny looked adorable when she was excited about something so childish. Jenny practically dragged her mommy into the store. She hadn’t wanted a toy in years, and she really didn’t know what she wanted, but she knew that babies loved toys, and she was a baby, so she knew that she would love to get a toy. She then spied a Barbie doll. She remembered how much she used to love Barbie as she picked up one to examine it.
“I’ll bet playing with a Barbie would make a baby feel like a big girl,” Sally remarked.
That’s it, Jenny thought. Barbies aren’t meant for babies! If she got one, she would finally be doing something that would make her feel mature and confident again! She had to have it. She looked at her mommy with big puppy dog eyes.
“Mommy, can I please have a Barbie doll?”
“I don’t know, those are made for big kids. You could choke on the parts.”
“Please, Mommy! I’ll be real good! I promise!”
“Well I suppose I can think about it if you behave…”
“I will Mommy!” said Jenny excitedly as she gave Sally a big hug.
The only other distraction on the way to Babys R Us was the McDonalds in the food court. Jenny didn’t really notice it at first, but once Sally mentioned how much babies enjoy happy meals and the toys that come in them, Jenny really wanted to go. Unfortunately for her, her mommy said that she already had dinner plans, but she said that they could stop by sometime in the week, so Jenny wasn’t too upset.
As they entered Babies R Us, Jenny was noticeably a bit antsy. Her mommy could tell what was wrong.
“Babies don’t peepee in the potty. They just go in their diapers, and half the time, they don’t even notice that they’re going.”
Jenny felt a sense of relief. As she started to walk again, she noticed that her diaper was heavier. She gasped as she realized that she just peed her pants. Despite the fact that she was a baby, and that it was normal for a baby to pee her diaper, she still felt that it was embarrassing for some reason. She put her pacifier back into her mouth, and soon she was back to feeling pretty normal, though she did notice that a wet diaper wasn’t as comfy as a clean one.
Her mother soon brought her to a rack of clothes. Jenny was confused. All of these clothes were for babies. Er…regular sized babies. There was no possible way that she could fit into them. Yet her mommy pulled a onesie off the rack and held it against her body, as if she was seeing how it would look on her.
“Mommy, these clothes look a little small…”
“Nonsense, they’re designed for someone your age. They’ll fit you just fine.” Once more those words seemed to echo beyond their volume, and Sally waved that silly little plastic wand. Jenny rolled her eyes. Yeah, she though, you’re going to magically make them fit me. The idea was comical, and she had to hold back a laugh.
“Fine, don’t believe me. Just remember that you need to be a good girl if you want a toy.”
That shut Jenny up. Sally went on to pick out a small collection of shirts, onesies, dresses, nightgowns, and footed pajamas. She decided that that was enough and brought the whole thing into the dressing room. Jenny still didn’t believe anything there would fit, but she tried to hide her skepticism as her mother pulled off her shirt.
“Now bend down and put your arms up,” Sally said as she pulled out a onesie. Jenny reached up and was surprised to find that her hands fit through the arm holes, and she was even more surprised when her head fit through without issue. Soon, Sally buttoned the bottom, and Jenny found that it fit her perfectly.
How could this be, Jenny thought. There’s no way that it was remotely close to this size earlier, and she doubted anything could stretch that much. Heck, it seemed a little baggy around the waist, so that wouldn’t even make any sense. Could Mommy really have used magic?
She put her pacifier back into her mouth and began to calm down.
No, there has to be a a logical explanation. I’ve used to wearing big girl clothes (for a minute she wondered why, but she put that thought aside), so maybe I’m just used to their large size. It makes sense that baby clothes would be smaller. Yes, that had to be it.
Jenny then realized that the had just been standing there zoned out for a moment while her mother stared at her, looking quite amused. Jenny was embarrassed.
“I-I’m sorry I doubted you, Mommy. I guess I’m just not used to looking for baby clothes.”
“So you don’t think magic needed to make them fit?”
Jenny was afraid to answer, but she quietly turned her head from side to side.
Sally laughed and patted her baby on the head. “You’re such a smart girl”
Jenny was greatly relieved that her Mommy wasn’t mad at her. She also felt pretty smart for figuring the whole clothing issue out, and her mommy’s praise made it even better.
Sally looked her over Jenny for a moment, examining the outfit. “I think it suits you. Babies look good in baby clothes, particularly when the clothes are really cute.” Jenny hadn’t really thought much of the outfit before, but she realized her mommy was right. She was a baby, so she looked good in baby clothes. She wondered why she was so resistant to wearing them before. Sally then began to unbutton Jenny’s onesie and took notice of her diaper.
“I’ll bet you’d like that changed”
Jenny nodded, so Sally had her lay down, and she began to undo the tapes. For some reason, Jenny found this embarrassing, but she started sucking on her pacifier again, and she returned to being as happy as she was earlier. Sally soon wiped her down, slipped a clean diaper under her, and helped her back up to her feet.
“Thank you, Mommy.”
“You’re welcome, sweetie. You can ask me to change you when your diaper gets uncomfortable, you know. I really don’t mind.”
“I was a little embarrassed,” admitted Jenny.
Sally giggled a little. “You’re adorable.” Jenny was pleased that her Mommy was happy with her.
Sally went on to try the rest of the outfits on Jenny. They all fit her perfectly, but Jenny was no longer surprised at this. Jenny really liked this one Disney Princess shirt, particularly when her mommy pointed out how much baby girls love princesses. Sally thought most of the outfits were adorable on Jenny, and she particularly liked this one colorful dress that didn’t quite cover her diaper. As they exited the dressing room, Jenny started to feel a bit off.
“Mommy, I need to use the bathroom.”
Sally looked confused. “Well, first of all, babies use the word ‘potty.’”
“I have to go potty.”
“Second, babies peepee in their diapers, remember?”
“But I have to poop,” she said, blushing slightly.
“Oh, right,” said Sally as she began to look relieved. “Mommy doesn’t like changing poopy diapers, so go ahead and use the potty. It’s over there on the other side of the building.”
“I can go by myself?”
“I know you’ll be a good girl and come right back to me when you’re done. I’ll be back with the baby girl clothes where we were before.”
Jenny beamed. After having her diaper changed by her mommy, being allowed to go poopy in the potty all by herself made her feel like such a big girl. It wasn’t until she was halfway to the bathroom that she realized the problem with doing this: good babies don’t take off their own diapers, and even if she did, babies didn’t put on their own clothes, so she couldn’t diaper herself. So not only would she be a bad girl, she would have to come back to her mommy naked from the waist down. That would be very embarrassing. She would have to bring her mother along. She found her mother looking at some bathing suits.
“Well that was fast.’
“Er..well… I didn’t go yet, ’cause I didn’t want to be a bad girl,” she said as she looked down at her diaper.
“Oh right. You’re a good girl for coming back to Mommy for this. Let me get that for you,” she said as she, in one swift motion, tore the diaper off of Jenny. Jenny turned redder than she had all day, and she almost covered herself before she remembered that babies don’t do that. A couple other mothers their giggled at the site. She was such a cute baby, and the fact that she got embarrassed like a bigger girl would just made her that much more adorable.
“You shouldn’t be embarrassed like that. You’re too young for nudity to be anything other than cute. Now go and use the potty so I can diaper you again. I don’t want you to make a mess of the floor.”
Somehow, that didn’t make Jenny feel that much better, but she didn’t want to get her mommy angry, so she put her pacifier in her mouth and ran off towards the bathroom. She sucked that pacifier harder and faster than she ever had before, but it didn’t completely take away the embarrassment. In fact, after she finished using the potty, it took several minutes for her to calm down enough to go back into the store. When she was finally ready, she ran back to her mother as fast as she could. She could feel people looking at her, and a little boy pointed and laughed before his mother scolded him. She felt like crying by the time she reached Sally.
“There’s Mommy’s good girl. Now spread your legs a little so Mommy can get your diaper back on. And calm down, no one thinks you’re anything other than cute naked.”
“Then why did that boy laugh at me?” replied Jenny as she wiped away some tears.
Sally looked concerned as she taped up the diaper. “What kind of jerk mocks a baby? Where is he?” Jenny pointed to an 8-year-old boy about 30 feet away. Sally pulled out her wand (again with the magic nonsense, thought Jenny), waved it at him, and muttered something that Jenny couldn’t hear. Instantly, Jenny noticed a stain appear on the front of his pants. Jenny pointed and laughed. It really was funny to her, since, unlike Jenny, he was much too big to be wetting his pants. The kid looked absolutely mortified, and Jenny felt much better.
“Well I think that fixes things,” said Sally. Jenny nodded. “Oh, I think i forgot to mention it, but this place carries toys.”
Jenny got so excited that she started to hop up and down. Sally thought it was amazingly cute.
“Gee, why do I get the strange feeling that someone wouldn’t mind taking a look at them?” joked Sally.
“Please can we!?”
“Oh, alright, I’ll take you over.”
From the rattles to the building blocks to the stuffed animals, Jenny loved it all. She ran back and forth examining every little thing like it was a work of art.
“You know, you’ve been a really good girl today, so go ahead and pick out a toy or two for Mommy to get you.”
Jenny’s eyes lit up, and she ran and hugged her mommy. This was the best news she heard all day. The only problem now was picking out something out of all this awesome stuff. After about 20 minutes, Jenny had finally narrowed her choices down to a big stuffed bunny rabbit, a rattle, and a set of bath toys, and Sally relented to just buying all of them. Jenny was the happiest she’d been in a long time. The only problem came when they passed the toy store on the way out.
Oh no, thought Jenny as she stopped and looked at the store, I forgot about Barbie!
Sally noticed where her daughter was looking. “You still want that Barbie don’t you?”
Jenny nodded hopefully.
“I’m sorry, but I’ve already spent too much today, and you got plenty of toys. Maybe you can get one next time.”
Jenny saddened a bit, but once she was in the car and Sally let her play with the rattle, she felt better. It may not be as mature and cool as Barbie, thought Jenny, but this thing is still a lot of fun. Jenny was laughing by the time they got home.
“Let’s put your new toys in your room, and then I can play with you if you want.” Jenny brought the bags towards a room that Jenny hadn’t been in before.
“My room? You sure you want to go all the way back to campus now?”
“Don’t be silly. Babies live with their mommies. In fact, the idea of having to live away from their mommies is scary to babies. And the idea of you living in a dorm is silly, since babies don’t go to college.”
That made perfect sense to Jenny. Her mommy lived here, so she must live here with her. She tried to think of living in a dorm again, but the idea sent a shiver down her spine. Something still seemed off about this whole thing though, but she couldn’t put her finger on it.
Sally opened the door to reveal a light pink room that was furnished for a baby. There was a crib with a mobile over it, a changing table, a small dresser, on top of which were a Disney Princess TV and a stack of Disney movies, a rocking horse, and set of alphabet blocks. This was obviously Jenny’s room, but something really felt wrong about it. It seemed strange to her that Sally had already had a room furnished for a baby, but that shouldn’t bother her, since it made sense that her mommy would have a room for her baby. Something was also off-putting about how permanent this all looked. The furniture didn’t look cheap, so it was obviously bought to last a while. Jenny didn’t know why this disturbed her, since it made sense for a mommy to expect her baby to be around for a while.
Sally noticed how uneasy Jenny looked. “Well, I was going to save this for your birthday, but you’ve been such a good girl today that I think I’ll just give it to you know.”
Jenny looked confused for a moment, until her mother produced the very Barbie doll that she had wanted earlier. Jenny lit up and forgot whatever it was that was troubling her. She ran up, took the box out of her mommy’s hand, and ripped it open. She pulled the doll out and gave it a big hug.
“I went out and grabbed it when you were in the potty. I figured you were mature enough to handle a big girl toy like that.”
Jenny ran up and hugged Sally as hard as she could. “Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou!”
“You’re such a good girl,” said Sally. “Now go ahead and play with your new toy.”
Jenny was so happy that her mommy trusted her to be such a big girl. She had a great time as she brushed Barbie’s hair and changed her into various outfits. She soon noticed that her diaper seemed to be a bit uncomfortable again, but she decided she would ask her mommy to change it once Barbie and Bun Bun (as she named the stuffed rabbit) were done going to the beach. Jenny couldn’t remember the last time she felt so happy or so mature.